tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32718932223266068372024-03-13T08:34:00.942-04:00Well Rounded Birth PrepWell rounded, evidence based info for informed, empowered births and beyond.Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.comBlogger104125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-37370048237238321552013-05-20T21:58:00.001-04:002013-05-20T22:04:17.997-04:00Teen Questions About Birth & Our Bodies: Part 2<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">I had the privilege this week to be a guest speaker in a high school biology class this week, to teach on the topic of birth. I only had 50 minutes, so I really had to condense to the basics. My normal class series for pregnant couples is 12 hours of class time, and I really could use more time than that! So keeping it to "just" 50 minutes was really a challenge!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">Since this was the first such class I had taught, I misjudged my timing and ran out of time for questions. I'll try to do better if I have another such opportunity in the future. Fortunately, the teacher had the students write up questions for me before the class, andI brought those home with me to answer here on my blog.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">I ask that if you are under the age of 18 and reading this blog, especially if you go to the school where I spoke, ask you</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">r parents' permission before proceeding. I am comfortable discussing any of these topics and teaching from an honest, evidence-based, and God-honoring perspective about the incredible design of our bodies, but I do not want any angry parents calling or emailing me or the school.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Here are the teens' questions, continued. Part 2 will be just on cycles and fertility. <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2013/05/teen-questions-about-birth-our-bodies.html" target="_blank">(Here is the link to Part 1.)</a></span></span><br />
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<li><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">"Why is it when you find out you're pregnant, you don't have your period like you normally would?" "Ask about periods (All of the period)." "Can you explain ovarian menstrual cycle?" "Discharge?" "What is estrogen?" "Birth control?"</span></span></li>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">These are great questions, and I'm glad they were brave enough to ask. Since these questions are all interrelated, I'll try to segue my answers. I'd really love to do a detailed class specifically for teens and young 20's about menstrual cycles, but it would require a permission slip, for certain.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">I'm going to have to keep the explanation really basic, because literally, entire books have been written on the topic. In fact, I'll go ahead and recommend a few:</span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-X8H5boMjhFc/UZrDX6Hb5JI/AAAAAAAAAfU/caGFl6I_GUU/s1600/CycleSavvy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-X8H5boMjhFc/UZrDX6Hb5JI/AAAAAAAAAfU/caGFl6I_GUU/s1600/CycleSavvy.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Cycle-Savvy-Smart-Teens-Mysteries/dp/0060829648/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1369096967&sr=1-3&keywords=toni+weschler" target="_blank">Cycle Savvy: The Smart Teen's Guide to the Mysteries of Her Body</a> for mature pre-teens and teens who are ready to know the details about their body's workings.</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fTyshBpOeEg/UZrEHC9pWJI/AAAAAAAAAfc/xly51LZz_6c/s1600/Care&Keeping1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fTyshBpOeEg/UZrEHC9pWJI/AAAAAAAAAfc/xly51LZz_6c/s1600/Care&Keeping1.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Care-Keeping-You-Younger-Revised/dp/1609580834/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1369097203&sr=1-1&keywords=the+care+and+keeping+of+you" target="_blank">The Care & Keeping of You 1: The Body Book for Younger Girls</a> for girls age 8 and up, with very basic explanations of puberty and cycles.</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-CQ2ER2jFT-o/UZrEmnXhrOI/AAAAAAAAAfo/d47tqkKJe54/s1600/TCOYF.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-CQ2ER2jFT-o/UZrEmnXhrOI/AAAAAAAAAfo/d47tqkKJe54/s1600/TCOYF.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Your-Fertility-Anniversary/dp/0060881909/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1369097323&sr=1-1&keywords=toni+weschler" target="_blank">Taking Charge of Your Fertility: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control, Pregnancy Achievement, and Natural Health</a> book and <a href="http://tcoyf.com/" target="_blank">website</a>. For very mature teens and any adult woman who wants to thoroughly understand her reproductive system. I highly recommend that all women read this before they get married and/or plan a pregnancy. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">It calls itself the "Definitive Guide," and that's no exaggeration. Ladies, do you have irregular cycles? Hard cramps? Possible endocrine or hormonal problems or imbalances? Want to know WHAT'S UP DOWN THERE??? Get this book, start charting your cycles as it teaches you (which involves a lot more than just circling days on a calendar!), and take your findings to your midwife, GYN, or OB. Don't have one yet? Most midwives can take care of all your well-woman care, tests, etc. The midwifery model of care for pregnancy and birth is the most evidence-based for the majority of healthy women, so why not get established with a midwife from the start? If you have a rare or high risk situation, they will refer you to a specialist. This collaborative care model is one that we are already familiar with. For instance, most healthy people do not have a cardiologist. They likely see a general/family practice doctor, who will refer them out to a cardiologist if some high risk situation comes up. It's like that with midwifery. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">How to condense this to a very basic overview? This is going to be really long, I can tell. Here's a better explanation from a .gov, trustworthy & not coming from a corporation that's trying to make a buck off you by selling disposable products and making you feel bad about yourself in the process.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://womenshealth.gov/publications/our-publications/fact-sheet/menstruation.cfm" target="_blank">Menstruation and the menstrual cycle fact sheet: Womenshealth.gov</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;">From Womenshealth.gov:</span></div>
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<a href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3271893222326606837" name="a">What is menstruation?</a><br />
<a href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3271893222326606837" name="b">What is the menstrual cycle?</a><br />
<a href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3271893222326606837" name="c">What happens during the menstrual cycle?</a><br />
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Menstruation (men-STRAY-shuhn) is a woman's monthly bleeding. When you menstruate, your body sheds the lining of the <span class="glossary" title="click for glossary definition"><a href="http://womenshealth.gov/glossary/#uterus" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(102, 102, 102); border-bottom-style: dashed; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #4a006e; text-decoration: none;">uterus</a></span> (womb). Menstrual blood flows from the uterus through the small opening in the <span class="glossary" title="click for glossary definition"><a href="http://womenshealth.gov/glossary/index.cfm#cervix" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(102, 102, 102); border-bottom-style: dashed; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #4a006e; text-decoration: none;">cervix</a></span> and passes out of the body through the <span class="glossary" title="click for glossary definition"><a href="http://womenshealth.gov/glossary/index.cfm#vagina" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(102, 102, 102); border-bottom-style: dashed; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #4a006e; text-decoration: none;">vagina</a></span>. Most menstrual periods last from 3 to 5 days.</div>
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When periods (menstruations) come regularly, this is called the menstrual cycle. Having regular menstrual cycles is a sign that important parts of your body are working normally. The menstrual cycle provides important body chemicals, called hormones, to keep you healthy. It also prepares your body for pregnancy each month. A cycle is counted from the first day of 1 period to the first day of the next period. The average menstrual cycle is 28 days long. Cycles can range anywhere from 21 to 35 days in adults and from 21 to 45 days in young teens.</div>
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The rise and fall of levels of hormones during the month control the menstrual cycle.</div>
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<a href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=3271893222326606837" name="c" style="color: #452a67;"><span style="color: black;">In the first half of the cycle, levels of</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span class="glossary" style="color: black;" title="click for glossary definition"></span></a><a href="http://womenshealth.gov/glossary/index.cfm#estrogen" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(102, 102, 102); border-bottom-style: dashed; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #4a006e; text-decoration: none;">estrogen</a> (the “female hormone”) start to rise. Estrogen plays an important role in keeping you healthy, especially by helping you to build strong bones and to help keep them strong as you get older. Estrogen also makes the lining of the uterus (womb) grow and thicken. This lining of the womb is a place that will nourish the embryo if a pregnancy occurs. At the same time the lining of the womb is growing, an egg, or ovum, in one of the ovaries starts to mature. At about day 14 of an average 28-day cycle, the egg leaves the ovary. This is called ovulation.</div>
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After the egg has left the ovary, it travels through the <span class="glossary" title="click for glossary definition"><a href="http://womenshealth.gov/glossary/index.cfm#fallopian" style="border-bottom-color: rgb(102, 102, 102); border-bottom-style: dashed; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #4a006e; text-decoration: none;">fallopian tube</a></span> to the uterus. Hormone levels rise and help prepare the uterine lining for pregnancy. A woman is most likely to get pregnant during the 3 days before or on the day of ovulation. Keep in mind, women with cycles that are shorter or longer than average may ovulate before or after day 14.</div>
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A woman becomes pregnant if the egg is fertilized by a man’s sperm cell and attaches to the uterine wall. If the egg is not fertilized, it will break apart. Then, hormone levels drop, and the thickened lining of the uterus is shed during the menstrual period.</div>
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OK. So does that answer most of it? For the specifics of the questions asked, the reason a woman her period is that she ovulated approximately 2 weeks before, and the egg was not fertilized. The uterine lining builds up in preparation to make a cozy home for a fertilized egg and sustain it as it grows. If no fertilized egg implants into that rich, nutritious (for a new baby) uterine lining, then the body sheds that lining in preparation to start all over again. So, when a woman misses her period due to pregnancy, there aren't periods during the pregnancy because the fertilized egg implanted, began to grow, and used that lining. Did I explain that well in lay terms?</div>
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If a mother exclusively breastfeeds (that means nursing on baby's cue's around the clock, with no bottles or pacifiers and no other foods or supplements), then there is a 98-99% chance that her <a href="http://kellymom.com/bf/normal/fertility/" target="_blank">fertility (periods) will be suppressed for 6 months</a>. This is a great benefit in helping with natural child spacing.</div>
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What is discharge?</div>
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The vagina is self-cleaning. It doesn't need douches, sprays, creams, or lotions. In fact, any of these products can disrupt its healthy, normal pH level and make it have an odor or even cause an infection. Advertisers want to make women feel self-conscious and embarrassed about your lady parts. Well, guess what, ladies? Your parts are awesome! You were fearfully and wonderfully made. Your body is not a lemon, and it deserves some respect! News flash: lady parts were never meant to smell like spring rain. They're supposed to smell like lady parts. In fact, be very cautious what soap you use in that area, because even soaps can throw off the pH of the area or cause a reaction to fragrance, colors, or other ingredients in the soaps. You might be best off just to use fresh, clean water.</div>
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So, where am I going with that? What I'm trying to convey is that discharge is not dirty or gross. It's a normal part of our fertility & cycles, part of a healthy body. Part of discharge's function is the body's self-cleaning, but much of its purpose is intricate and amazing: it is cervical fluid produced to help sperm get to the cervix during fertility. Like I said, all the details of it fill a book, but by observing your pattern of normal discharge daily, and getting to know your body, you can know when you are fertile or not fertile. This requires a lot more reading and training than this blog, just as a disclaimer. I'm just introducing the concept to you, perhaps for the first time that you are hearing it, that the texture and consistency of normal vaginal discharge is directly related to fertility and the body gearing up for someday, when you are ready to be pregnant. Pretty impressive, huh?</div>
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If you get to know your body's norm, it will be obvious to you if something is *not* your norm. If there is a foul odor to discharge or it's a color you've never seen before, or if there is itching, this could possibly indicate an infection that needs treatment. Please see your midwife or doctor.</div>
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On to birth control. There are many options for birth control, both pharmaceutical and non-pharmaceutical. Not many women are advised of the risks of pharmaceutical birth control methods, so if it's something you're considering, I highly recommend you do a lot of reading to make sure the benefits outweigh the risks in your instance. </div>
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Some teens are advised to go on birth control pills because of irregular or very hard and painful periods. This isn't the only option out there. If this is your situation, you might be able to find a midwife or naturopath who can give you options that don't have the short- and long-term risks of pharmaceutical birth control methods. Rather than using a drug to artificially stimulate the body to have periods, it can be beneficial to figure out what the underlying problem is that's causing the symptoms of pain or irregular cycles, and treat THAT instead of treating the symptoms.</div>
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Here's one article on the subject. <a href="http://wellnessmama.com/8396/natural-alternatives-to-hormonal-contraceptives/" target="_blank">"Natural Alternatives to Hormonal Contraceptives"</a></div>
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It goes through a long list of risks and side effects of chemical/hormonal contraceptives and gives alternative options.</div>
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Here's my awesome Pinterest board for <a href="http://pinterest.com/sarahdegroff/fertility-cycles/" target="_blank">Fertility & Cycles</a>. I update it regularly with newly bookmarked articles.</div>
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So that's that. Any other questions? I hope I didn't wear you out with too lengthy a response, but I wouldn't know how to answer it with less! </div>
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Here is the <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2013/05/teen-questions-about-birth-our-bodies.html" target="_blank">link to Part 1</a> of this series. Part 3 is upcoming!</div>
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Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-31572851479531164922013-05-19T15:41:00.000-04:002013-05-20T22:16:43.709-04:00Teen Questions About Birth & Our Bodies: Part 1I had the privilege this week to be a guest speaker in a high school biology class this week, to teach on the topic of birth. I only had 50 minutes, so I really had to condense to the basics. My normal class series for pregnant couples is 12 hours of class time, and I really could use more time than that! So keeping it to "just" 50 minutes was really a challenge!<br />
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Since this was the first such class I had taught, I misjudged my timing and ran out of time for questions. I'll try to do better if I have another such opportunity in the future. Fortunately, the teacher had the students write up questions for me before the class, and I brought those home with me to answer here on my blog.<br />
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I ask that if you are under the age of 18 and reading this blog, especially if you go to the school where I spoke, ask your parents' permission before proceeding. I am comfortable discussing any of these topics and teaching from an honest, evidence-based, and God-honoring perspective about the incredible design of our bodies, but I do not want any angry parents calling or emailing me or the school.<br />
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Here are the questions that were submitted.<br />
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<li>"What is the umbilical cord?", "What does the placenta do?", and "What happens to the umbilical cord after you give birth?"</li>
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The umbilical cord connects the baby to his placenta. The blood in the placenta and in the cord belong to the baby, not the mother. The mother's blood and baby's blood do not mix. </div>
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The placenta provides all the nutrients, oxygen, etc. to the baby via the cord, and the cord transfers waste materials from the baby back to the placenta to be processed and eliminated.</div>
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The placenta is typically the size of a dinner plate and looks a bit like liver or other organ meat. It's not gross, it's pure awesome, once you discover how incredible it is and what it does.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-z-CbalRc52s/UZkZQwqwCuI/AAAAAAAAAe0/uj9pJ73c8r4/s1600/Screen+Shot+2013-05-19+at+2.24.28+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="380" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-z-CbalRc52s/UZkZQwqwCuI/AAAAAAAAAe0/uj9pJ73c8r4/s400/Screen+Shot+2013-05-19+at+2.24.28+PM.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is the baby's side of the placenta, with the umbilical cord coming from the middle. The baby is attached to the other end of the cord. Source: http://www.pampers.com/common/pdf/pc/hb/CBE_book_for_students.pdf</td></tr>
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The cord provides oxygen and other essentials to the baby in the womb and in the first few minutes after the birth, while the baby's lungs are inflating and acclimating to breathing air for the first time. It's essential for baby's oxygenation that the cord remain intact for a *minimum* of 3 minutes after the birth, according to the World Health Organization. Additionally, since the blood in the placenta and cord are part of the baby's total blood volume and designed to be returned to the baby through the cord after the birth, if the cord is clamped and cut prematurely, the baby is deprived of 30-40% of his total blood volume, which means that many babies have low iron levels due to that blood loss. This is a health problem called "anemia," and it's measurable for 6 months or more after the birth in babies whose cords were cut too early.</div>
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Here's a video that explains how this transfer of baby's blood occurs after the birth, and why it's important to wait for it. Many hospitals are in the habit of clamping and cutting the cord within 15 seconds after baby's birth, just out of routine.</div>
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/W3RywNup2CM?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
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You can tell the cord is ready to be clamped and cut when it quits pulsating. After the birth, you can put your fingers on the cord and gently squeeze it and and feel a pulse, just like feeling your own pulse. What you are feeling is the baby's pulse. While that pulsing is still going on, baby is still retrieving his blood from the placenta and cord. When it feels and looks empty, then it's ready to clamp and cut.</div>
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The OB or midwife will place one sterile, plastic clamp a few inches from where the cord attaches to baby, leave a bit of space, then sometimes place a second clamp. A lot of dads like to be the one who cuts the cord. It's done with surgical scissors, and it's very easy to do. My then-5-year-old son cut his baby brother's cord, in fact. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That's my 5 y.o. on the left, cutting his baby brother's cord about 20 or 30 minutes after he was born.</td></tr>
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It does not hurt the baby at all when the cord is cut.</div>
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<li>"Why are the testicles separated from the rest of the body?"</li>
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I think I get what you're asking. As in, hanging down from, as opposed to as an internal organ? The primary purpose of that is to keep the testes away from the body so that they stay at a lower temperature. Sperm die at high temperatures. This is why men who have low sperm counts are advised to stay away from hot tubs, and to wear boxer shorts as opposed to tighty-whities.</div>
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<li>"Does your stomach go back to normal size after birth?"</li>
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For the first few days or weeks after giving birth, many moms still look pregnant. It takes a while for internal organs to go back to where they are supposed to be, and for the uterus to shrink down to its normal non-pregnant size. There is much variation from one mother to the next. Some moms go right back to pretty much the way they looked before pregnancy. Others hold onto pregnancy weight for a variety of reasons; the body needs extra fat reserves to be able to produce milk. That weight is there for a reason (provided it was gained on high quality nutrition)! My midwife always says, "It took 9 months to put that weight on; it should take at least 9 months to take that weight off."<br />
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Some moms get stretch marks; others don't. There are many factors to this: genetics, nutrition & hydration, amount of weight gain, speed of weight gain (skin has time to stretch gently if it's gradual as opposed to quick weight gain), and if there are multiples (twins, triplets, etc.). Some moms' skin stays stretched even after the muscles & organs go back, sort of like a balloon that has been filled and then emptied. And some moms look like they never were pregnant, with smooth, taut bellies. </div>
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All of these variations are normal and healthy. In my personal opinion, we need to be focusing on health and wellness more than looks. Many moms feel unnecessary pressure to get back to "pre-pregnancy weight" or "pre-pregnancy shape." Why should we feel outside pressure to conform to societal ideals that moms should look like pre-pubescent or pubescent young women who have never been pregnant? There's no reason to deny our basic biology. Personally, I'm at peace with my stretch marks. God designed our bodies to be capable of incredible miracles in creating, growing, and sustaining human life. My body's marks are proof of that.</div>
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A really neat website where you can see the many variations of mothers' bodies after pregnancy is <a href="http://theshapeofamother.com/" target="_blank">Shape of a Mother</a>, but there is some nudity on that site, for educational purposes of accepting the human form. Please get parental permission before viewing.</div>
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<li>"What is a C-section?"</li>
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A C-section, also called cesarean or cesarean section, is major abdominal surgery to deliver a baby. In most cases, a vaginal delivery is safest for mom and for baby, but in some instances, a C-section is helpful or even life-saving for mom or baby or both. Other times, a C-section could have been prevented, and exposes mom and baby to unnecessary risks both short-term and long-term. Since C-sections have become so common (32.8% of all births in the U.S. are surgical births; in WV, the rate is 36.3% of all births, the 5th highest rate in the U.S.), it's important for all pregnant moms to get informed on risk/benefit and factors that contribute to higher cesarean risk.</div>
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Free downloadable e-book <a href="http://www.childbirthconnection.org/article.asp?ck=10164" target="_blank">"What Every Pregnant Woman Needs to Know About Cesarean Section"</a></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Source: http://www.pampers.com/common/pdf/pc/hb/CBE_book_for_students.pdf</td></tr>
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From <a href="http://www.pampers.com/common/pdf/pc/hb/CBE_book_for_students.pdf">http://www.pampers.com/common/pdf/pc/hb/CBE_book_for_students.pdf</a></div>
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"Most of the time, epidural or spinal anesthesia is used, allowing the mother to be awake during the birth. In almost all cases, a labor partner can also be present... Once the cesarean begins, it only takes a few minutes for the baby to be born through an incision in the mother's lower abdomen. Then it usually takes around 45 minutes to complete the operation."</div>
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<li>"What is the pain level of having a baby?"</li>
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That question is tough to answer, because it's so subjective, and varies not just from one mother to the next, but also from one birth experience to the next, even with the same mother.</div>
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There are many factors regarding the pain level, but one important one to note is FEAR. The more the mother fears birth, the more painful she will perceive it, <a href="http://thechart.blogs.cnn.com/2012/06/27/fearing-childbirth-may-prolong-labor/?iref=obinsite" target="_blank">the longer her labor is likely to be</a>, the more likely she is to undergo preventable medical interventions, and <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9654177" target="_blank">the more likely she is to end up with a cesarean</a>. Cesarean recovery is a whole different situation, as it is a major abdominal surgery, and if a mother has had more than one cesarean, recovery can be even more difficult.</div>
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The antidotes to fearing birth are often education and support. We are in a cultural crisis of fear of birth and negative stories about birth. Many times, the only things a pregnant woman knows about birth prior to giving birth, are what she has seen on reality TV shows about birth. Sadly, instead of giving moms confidence in their bodies' wonderful design and ability to give birth to their babies, these shows terrify viewers with drama and horror stories. (Peaceful, positive births aren't good for ratings or ad revenue.) <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1595148/" target="_blank">This is well documented.</a> I highly recommend that expectant moms and their birth partners take a comprehensive childbirth class, fairly early in their pregnancy, to an independent childbirth educator who isn't under a gag order by their employer not to share details beyond their policies and protocols.</div>
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<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlj9ehB-hLc" target="_blank">There is a difference between pain and suffering</a> in labor. Labor can be intensely painful, but for moms who are confident, well supported, and not fearful, this doesn't mean she will suffer. Moms in labor who are supported emotionally and physically to listen to her body and allow her to move, eat, sleep, and cope as her body tells her to do, are usually able to labor and give birth without pain medications. The positions that feel most comfortable to mom in labor are usually the ones that help the baby move down and through the pelvis, making labor more efficient and safe.</div>
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The more intense and painful labor becomes, the more endorphins (morphine-like hormones) the body produces, in an unmedicated birth. The mom actually enters a dreamlike state, a sort of altered state of consciousness, that helps her cope with the increasing pain. So, the more painful it gets, the more capable the body is of handling the pain and reducing the mom's perception of that pain.</div>
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Dr. Sarah Buckley has an excellent topic elaborating on this topic.</div>
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<a href="http://www.sarahbuckley.com/pain-in-labour-your-hormones-are-your-helpers/" target="_blank">"Pain in Labour: Your hormones are your helpers"</a></div>
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There are a number of options, both non-pharmaceutical and pharmaceutical, for pain relief in labor. Full explanation would take way too much space here. I encourage all expectant parents to take a class on all their options for coping with labor pain, so they can have the info on risk/benefit well in advance.</div>
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Personally, I've had 5 vaginal births with no pain medications whatsoever. Each experience was different; all were painful, but I have no regrets at all. If we were to have another baby, I would make the same birth choices. The benefits of a safe, drug-free birth, not exposing my baby to narcotics unless there were a medical emergency for doing so, getting a good start bonding and breastfeeding, and having that "birth high" from endorphins, far outweigh the hours of pain in the process, for me personally.</div>
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On a side note: a very small percent of moms who have unmedicated births will have pain-free or even physically pleasurable labors and/or births, sometimes called ecstatic or <a href="http://movies.netflix.com/Movie/Orgasmic-Birth/70112621" target="_blank">orgasmic births</a>. </div>
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<ul>
<li>"How far along is it until you can tell the sex of the baby?"</li>
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After the birth. Seriously. Sort of. Even with all of today's technology, ultrasounds are still not 100% accurate with predicting baby's gender. I've read figures around 85-90% for accuracy of prediction. It depends on the type of ultrasound equipment used, how far along the baby is, baby's position and whether the sonographer can get a clear view of the genitals, skill of the sonographer, and more. Sometimes the baby's genitals are swollen from mom's hormones, which is normal, but can make girl parts look like boy parts, or vice versa. You think that's impossible? Ask the scores of parents who already painted the nursery the wrong color and had all the wrong clothes for the baby.</div>
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With that in mind, typically parents can find out (the best guess for) baby's gender at the 20-week ultrasound that is usually performed to help rule out health problems. If an ultrasound is performed earlier for elective or medical reasons, *sometimes* gender can be viewed as early as 13 weeks, but with way less accuracy. (There are risks associated with ultrasounds in pregnancy, so it's not recommended to have them without medical indication for them.)</div>
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To be continued in Part 2...<br />
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**UPDATE** link to<br />
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<a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2013/05/teen-questions-about-birth-our-bodies_20.html" target="_blank">Part 2 of Teen Questions About Birth & Our Bodies</a>.</div>
Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-18953758886330764122012-10-18T23:15:00.002-04:002012-10-18T23:16:07.212-04:00Julie's miscarriage story, from Christian perspective<br />
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>This is Julie's story of her miscarriage. She asked that only her first name be published, so if you know this family personally, please do not include identifying details in the comments. Thank you!</i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>October 15th</i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>October 15</i></span><span style="font: 8.0px 'Stone Sans Sem ITC TT'; letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i><sup>th</sup></i></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>, 2012 will mark a very sad but monumental day in my life. That was the day my little baby was born, never to live here with me but to be safe in the Father’s arms. Sharing my story comes from wanting to have some sort of closure but also stems from the desire to help those who are looking for some information during this difficult season of their life. Perhaps someone needs these exact details that will ease the pain or help with the process of losing a very precious part of a mommy’s life. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>When I found out that I was pregnant with my 6</i></span><span style="font: 8.0px 'Stone Sans Sem ITC TT'; letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i><sup>th</sup></i></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i> child, I was tickled and nervous. Five living children, homeschooling, and very active in my community, I could barely wrap my brain around adding another baby to my already busy schedule. On top of that, I would be 41 years old and my husband nearing 50 when our baby would be born. It was hard not to feel nervous about it, however, every child has been an incredible blessing to our family and I had absolutely no regrets. I felt like an old pro so I wasn’t in a rush to go to the OB/Gyn and get an ultrasound. I felt fertile and experienced so I got my vitamins, ordered my iron pills and watched my sugar (I often get an early onset of gestational diabetes). My husband and I started planning which large van to get come Spring as we would no longer be able to transport our growing family in our current one. I was excited as we anticipated this new baby! My children were also happily involved in dreaming about the baby. My 12-year-old daughter was especially excited as her little maternal instincts kicked in. We were thinking up names, imagining what the baby looked like, and overall enjoying the pregnancy. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>I finally got in to see the doctor at 12 weeks. Prior to the appointment, I had my first ultrasound. That morning, I woke up early to this dreadful feeling that the baby was not alive. I was cramping for 3 hours and if I had actively checked for discharge I believe I would’ve noticed something. However, I passed the cramping off to being backed up due to the extra iron pills I was taking. However, I couldn’t shake this foreboding that I wouldn’t see my baby alive. I think every pregnant mom has that fear in the back of her mind but usually it’s dismissed with a blinking heartbeat on the monitor. My fears would be confirmed, however, as the wand panned around my belly. I saw a gaping black hole and no heartbeat. I knew within 3 seconds that the baby was not alive. The technician was very quiet and didn’t say much but she was able to tell me that she didn’t see any activity. She checked and checked and we saw that the baby only measured 6 weeks, the gestational sac only 10 weeks and looked very irregular. She went to get a room for me to await the doctor so I wouldn’t have to go back into the waiting room. At that time, the tears rushed in and I sat crying while my husband held my hand. I couldn’t believe the baby was dead. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>My OB is a kind and experienced doctor. While not a believer, he is respectful of his patients’ beliefs and desires to make me comfortable. He gently explained what would happen while miscarrying, the option of the D&C now or later, as well as affirmed that there was nothing I could have done to prevent all this. I think one of the most helpful things he said was that it wasn’t my fault at all. I can’t blame it on age, that glass of wine during my anniversary dinner, that I didn’t take my vitamins early enough, or whatever it was. I know that many women carry guilt about what they did or could’ve done differently to prevent a miscarriage. I still wonder about my age, however, I will never know what happened exactly and feel that he eased my concerns early on. Whatever you did or didn’t do, you have to understand that it wasn’t your fault and be at peace knowing that every baby is a miracle. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>That day, I spent time at home crying and praying. I told the children and while the boys didn’t seem terribly affected, my girls were very sad, especially my 12-year-old. I could see that she was grieving as she stayed very close to me. She drew pictures expressing her grief that I’ve captured on camera and will hold dear to my heart. She stayed with me at night and we talked about things. I was very open with her as to what was happening and why. My dear husband was such a support at this time. He took her to a craft store to get a tiny wooden box that she could decorate in case we saw the baby. She painted it and waited for the baby to come. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>The hardest part was waiting. Every day, I spotted more and more. It was Tuesday when I started spotting. My husband took time off on Friday and Monday so he could help with the kids and the homeschool group I am in charge of. I prayed that the baby would come by the weekend. I started taking black and blue cohosh in order to speed the miscarriage along. 20 drops of each in a tiny bit of water, held under my tongue for about a minute five times a day was what I was told. The cohosh tasted nasty but I chased it with OJ and it was palatable. Sure enough, within a few days, the bleeding started and I felt confident that it was to happen on the weekend. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>The spotting turned to intermittent bleeding by Friday. Whenever I went to the bathroom and wiped, I turned up some brown blood as well as some blackened tissue. The lining was shedding slowly but surely. I also started cramping more and had a loss of appetite. I took this time to distract myself with cleaning and doing some other quiet projects I wanted to get done. I also prepared myself with what I was going to do to ‘catch’ the baby. You see, I suddenly had an incredible desire to see the baby. I felt so sad when I thought about my baby being flushed down the toilet. Please, if this happened to you, don’t feel badly. I know that if I didn’t see the baby, that was God’s sovereign plan, for whatever reason, but I really wanted to see it if I could. I was able to secure one of those ‘hats’ that you can put under the lid of the toilet that you go into to measure the volume of output. This assured that I would be able to see everything that came out before I flushed it. It definitely helped me feel less anxious about going to the bathroom.</i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>I also had a few other supplies ready: a small, clear container of water that I could put the baby in, craft sticks in case I had to sort through, disposable gloves, and paper plates. I also had some extra trash bags. I know these are a lot of details and I think at one point I would’ve thought this a bit macabre but I feel strongly about sharing details in case you are clueless what to do. This worked for me and I needed everything I had prepared. It was truly a blessing to be ready rather than panicked. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>I also checked out some websites that a friend sent to me. Several of these prepared me for what to expect. The one I found very useful was <a href="http://www.stillbirthday.com/2011/07/25/natural-miscarriage/" target="_blank">Still Birthday: Pregnancy Loss is Still a Birthday</a></i><i>. This had links to different developmental stages of your baby. It really helped me to visualize what size the baby might be as well as what it might look like. There are stories and actual pictures tastefully done. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>On Sunday evening, the bleeding started much more heavily. I started having to rush to the bathroom as the discharge gushed out in chunks. I felt stronger contractions – they were much stronger than menstrual cramps and were in intervals just like contractions. I was surprised by how strong some of them were. With each contraction, there was more bleeding and blood clots. I knew it had started. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>That night, I bled for hours and I stayed on the toilet for the majority of the night. I was surprised by how heavily I bled. I was able to see exactly how much volume of blood I was losing as I was going into the ‘hat’. Every 10-15 minutes, I had 300-500cc of discharge. Much of it was clotting and sometimes the clots were larger than the palm of my hand. I literally peed blood. Everything I had read said go to the doctor if you soak more than one pad an hour or if you bleed much more than a heavy period. That’s laughable as it was SO much more. (I found out later that earlier miscarriages (under 6 weeks) would bleed less but over 12 weeks this much blood was more normal.) I called my husband who stayed up with me. I think most husbands - and I sure don’t blame them! - would faint at the sight of so much blood. It truly looked like a murder scene. Terrible! My resolve to see the baby outweighed the grossness of the grim scene. My husband took over examining the discharge for any fetal parts. Thank God for a doctor husband! At one point we wondered, ‘</i></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px; text-decoration: underline;"><i>How much bleeding during a miscarriage is too much?</i></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>’ Neither one of us had seen so much blood. Yet, I wasn’t willing to go to the hospital until I knew I had passed the baby. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>After a few hours, I cramped terribly and when I looked, there was a tiny yolk sac and something fleshy near it. I knew in my heart that this was the baby. I put it in the container with some water to wash it off. After a while, it was obvious that it was different than the other mess that was coming out. It was irregular and very deformed and it had the color of flesh. The size indicated that it was definitely around 8-10 weeks rather than 6. It had degraded some and the parts were barely recognizable. However, I felt relieved. After bleeding heavily for about 2 hours more, I decided to go in to the hospital in case I had lost too much. I wasn’t scared or panicked. I did feel lightheaded and shaky though – most likely because of lack of sleep, no food, and an intense night on top of the loss of blood. Incredibly, I found a sitter at 5am and by 7am I was in the hospital. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>(I’ve decided not to post pics of the baby)</i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>I’m sharing what happened at the hospital in case you need to go. I didn’t know what to expect. First of all, I was surprised to see only one other person waiting (when I was discharged the waiting room was completely packed). I was taken back immediately and had a very kind doctor. She ordered some IV fluids, blood work, and an ultrasound first to determine whether I needed the more invasive step of a blood transfusion and a D & C. I prayed that I would need neither. The nurse was considerate about putting in the catheter when she heard that the ultrasound was ready for me, otherwise, I would be bed-ridden and uncomfortable for hours. Indeed it took 2 hours for the u/s to be ready for me. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>My husband was asked to stay in the waiting room during the u/s. I knew that this would happen and wasn’t too miffed about it. It was very different than the happy exciting ultrasound of my OB as the situation was more serious. She didn’t show me the screen, which I expected and she was very quiet while performing the procedure. I didn’t ask questions at this point because I know that techs are not supposed to say anything even though it is very hard for a person like me who wants to know everything and see it all not to say anything. I did answer her questions and tried to let her know that I knew what to expect and that I was not afraid of what she found out. I was sad but at peace. Near the end, I did ask her if the doctor would be able to tell me whether they saw the baby or not as this was very important to me. I wanted to be 100% sure that the ‘specimen’ I had at home was indeed my baby. She quietly confirmed that the baby was not there and that she only told me because I seemed ready to hear it. I was. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>Everything else was routine. My blood work came back within safe limits. I was anemic but not terribly so. I had taken some iron pills that night and morning and I’m sure that helped my levels some. I was sent back home with the assurance that we had done everything we could. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>I slept the whole day and night. The next morning, I woke up with an urge to run to the bathroom. There was a huge ‘whomp’ and I delivered the placenta. I didn’t expect that exactly as I thought I had passed bits of it earlier. It was a bit smaller than the size of my fist and one giant ball. After that, the cramps disappeared and the bleeding substantially subsided. I felt peace and closure (but a terrible migraine!).</i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>Was it a coincidence that October 15</i></span><span style="font: 8.0px 'Stone Sans Sem ITC TT'; letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i><sup>th</sup></i></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i> marked my baby’s birthday as well as The Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day? Was it by chance that dozens of my friends were remembering and lighting candles for their own children who they’ve not been able to hold or see and that they added one for me? Was it pure luck that one of my favorite bloggers, Tim Challies, had a podcast on <a href="http://www.challies.com/writings/podcast/early-infant-loss" target="_blank">Early Infant Loss</a></i><i> that very day? No. None of that is chance, my friends. It is pure grace. My heavenly Father showed such care and tenderness to me in so many ways during this time. I know that not everything goes according to our plans and they really don’t have to. However, at times, His sweetness overwhelms me as I find myself being supported, cared for, loved and cuddled by friends, family and especially, by my dear husband. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>I had so many sympathetic notes and remarks via texts and Facebook. I received kind and encouraging words and friends shared stories of their own miscarriages. I had the occasional person say, “Well, at least you have 5 kids.” or “Well, guess this is a sign that you’re getting old.” but I expected these remarks as not everyone has the education on what not to say during a miscarriage but most people have good, albeit awkward intentions. It really doesn’t matter how many children you have, what the chances are on having more, if you already have one boy and one girl, if you are getting along in your age, if you weren’t ecstatic upon the news that you were having another one, if you couldn’t afford to raise another baby. The pain is really there. Your baby has died. You’ve suffered a great loss and the grief can be as deep and as intense as if you’ve given birth to, raised, and bonded with your child. However, I want to extend the same grace to others as the Lord has to me as they help me cope with my loss. I don’t expect them to understand the deep sense of grief I feel as I never could truly sympathize when my friends miscarried. I could only imagine the pain.</i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>Honestly, as I reflect on the last week, I have gratefulness in my heart. Grateful that I have six children and one is completely loved and perfect in heaven. I have Biblical reassurance that this is the case (see the books: Little One Lost: Living With Early Infant Loss by Glenda Mathes and Safe in the Arms of God: Truth from Heaven About the Death of a Child by John Macarthur). I’m also grateful for the opportunity for this life experience for my daughter; for her to see the folly of evolution (one kink in the DNA and it cannot survive) versus the miracle of a beautiful baby created by a living and loving Maker. </i></span></div>
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<span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i>And he said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” Job 1:21</i></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Drawn by 12-year-old sister</td></tr>
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Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-64389420189842742202012-09-16T23:08:00.000-04:002012-09-16T23:59:23.276-04:00Weighing VBAC vs. repeat c-sectionI frequently get emails from mommas who are considering VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean) vs. ERCS (Elective Repeat Cesarean Section). Are you interested in the possibility of VBAC and wondering what your options are? Here are a few places to start your research.<br />
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This post is not intended to try to talk moms who want a repeat cesarean birth, into having a VBAC, or vice versa. There isn't one right answer for everyone. For some, repeat cesarean is best. For others, VBAC is best. It depends on your situation. My goal is to give a springboard for research for those who might want VBAC, but aren't sure where to start with looking into it.<br />
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Even if you are still just in the planning stages of your next pregnancy, talk to your care provider about your options now. If you are interested in the possibility of VBAC but your OB doesn't attend VBACs, your best option for having a VBAC will be switching to a care provider who DOES attend VBAC. (You can always change your mind later, if you decide you do want ERCS.) Current research supports the safety of VBAC for the majority of VBAC candidates and some VBAMC (Vaginal Birth After Multiple Cesarean) candidates. Some of the factors to consider are personal health history, reason for prior cesarean(s), how many prior cesareans, type of incision (low transverse incision is lowest risk, but other incisions don't necessarily mean that VBAC isn't a possibility), length of time between pregnancies, whether there were any post-op infections, how recovery/healing went, and more.<br />
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Another good step is to request your full medical records of your cesarean(s), including notes from anyone who attended the birth (doctors, nurses, etc.) so you can get the fullest picture possible of what led to the cesarean and all the circumstances surrounding it. You can also ask to have your medical records forwarded to another care provider (OB or midwife) who does attend VBAC and can give you a second opinion about your options.</div>
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Some OBs will not attend VBACs regardless of evidence of the safety of VBAC, simply because of their liability. Depending on their malpractice insurance, some OBs are forbidden to attend VBACs or their insurance company will drop their coverage. Some OBs aren't aware of the research and evidence supporting the safety of VBAC and VBAMC. For some, it's a matter of their personal perception of risk (regardless of the research) or anecdotal experience. For others, it's just their personal preference because cesareans are quicker and easier for OBs. Some hospitals have policies outright forbidding (intentional) VBACs, regardless of physician preference. Regardless of your OB's reason, he or she is highly unlikely to change his/her policy and begin attending VBACs or VBAMCs if he or she doesn't do so already. If you want to plan for a VBAC (or even just leave your options open to the possibility of VBAC), your best odds may be to change providers and/or birth location to a VBAC-friendly one.<br />
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The number one factor that with whether or not a mother will have a vaginal birth (whether VBAC, VBAMC, or even a mom's first birth) is choice of hospital and choice of care provider. Know your hospital's cesarean rate, and make sure that both your hospital's policies and your OB's or midwife's standards of practice are evidence based and support normal, physiologic birth.</div>
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Here is a link with WV hospital cesarean rates:</div>
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<a href="http://www.cesareanrates.com/west-virginia-cesarean-rates/" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">http://www.cesareanrates.com/<wbr></wbr>west-virginia-cesarean-rates/</a></div>
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In our region, the 4 major hospitals are Thomas (54.5% cesareans), CAMC (43.0%), Cabell (40.6%), and St. Mary's (24.3%), as of 2009 stats (the latest statistics available as of Sept. 2012).</div>
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You can find cesarean rates for other states and regions here:</div>
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<a href="http://CesareanRates.com/">CesareanRates.com</a><br />
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About 50% of US hospitals either have an outright or de facto ban on VBACs. De facto ban means there is no outright ban on VBAC at that hospital, but there are no care providers who attend births there who are willing and able to attend VBAC, for whatever reason (personal or legal). Some moms find that they have to travel a little or a lot to find a hospital that will support their desire to VBAC. The hospital closest to your house might not necessarily be the best hospital for your needs. Check out <a href="http://articles.cnn.com/2009-12-17/health/birth.plan.tips_1_vaginal-delivery-caesareans-vaginal-births?_s=PM:HEALTH" target="_blank">Joy Szabo's story</a>. She traveled 6 hours away to a hospital that would support her wish to VBAC her 4th child when she discovered that her prior hospital had banned VBACs after her previous successful VBAC with her 3rd child. </div>
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This article helps moms make sense of the National Institutes of Health recommendations for VBAC and VBAMC (most current research & recommendations). It looks at various factors and helps you know what questions to ask when you talk to your care provider.</div>
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<a href="http://givingbirthwithconfidence.org/2-2/a-womans-guide-to-vbac/" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">http://<wbr></wbr>givingbirthwithconfidence.org/<wbr></wbr>2-2/a-womans-guide-to-vbac/</a></div>
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Additionally, we are blessed to have the first ICAN in WV here in Charleston. ICAN is International Cesarean Awareness Network, the world's premiere organization for cesarean recovery, healing, support, prevention, and VBAC info.</div>
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Their website has a lot of great info for research on VBAC vs. ERCS.</div>
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<a href="http://ican-online.org/" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">http://ican-online.org/</a></div>
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Our local ICAN's website:</div>
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<a href="http://icangreatercharlestonwv.weebly.com/" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">http://<wbr></wbr>icangreatercharlestonwv.<wbr></wbr>weebly.com/</a></div>
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and their Facebook page where you can get local meeting info:</div>
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/ICANGreaterCharlestonWV" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/<wbr></wbr>ICANGreaterCharlestonWV</a></div>
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An excellent free podcast on preparing for VBAC by <a href="http://desirreandrews.com/">Desirre Andrews</a>, the former president of ICAN:</div>
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<a href="http://motherloveblog.com/2012/04/02/podcast-preparing-for-a-vaginal-birth-after-cesarean-vbac-with-the-president-of-ican/" target="_blank">http://motherloveblog.com/<wbr></wbr>2012/04/02/podcast-preparing-<wbr></wbr>for-a-vaginal-birth-after-<wbr></wbr>cesarean-vbac-with-the-<wbr></wbr>president-of-ican/</a></div>
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ChildbirthConnection.org is one of my favorite sites for evidence-based birth info. Here are a few of their resources.</div>
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<a href="http://www.childbirthconnection.org/article.asp?ClickedLink=293&ck=10212&area=27" target="_blank">VBAC or Repeat C-Section?</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.childbirthconnection.org/article.asp?ck=10211" target="_blank">Options: VBAC or Repeat C-section</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.childbirthconnection.org/article.asp?ck=10210&ClickedLink=293&area=27" target="_blank">Best Evidence: VBAC or Repeat C-Section</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.childbirthconnection.org/article.asp?ck=10214&ClickedLink=293&area=27" target="_blank">Tips and Tools: VBAC or Repeat C-Section</a></div>
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For moms who have a cesarean scar other than the traditional low transverse incision (including other uterine surgeries such as myomectomy), the group Special Scars ~ Special Women provides support and info on options.</div>
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Their website: <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 14px;"><a href="http://www.specialscars.org/" rel="nofollow" style="color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: underline;" target="_blank">http://www.specialscars.org</a></span></div>
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Their Facebook page: <a href="https://www.facebook.com/specialscars">https://www.facebook.com/specialscars</a></div>
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The medical term for "attempting a VBAC" is TOLAC (Trial of Labor After Cesarean), just so that you're not alarmed by that. That term can sometimes be a little bit unnerving or less-than-confidence-inducing for some moms, but nothing negative is meant or implied. It's just the terminology used.</div>
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If you are still in the planning stages of your next pregnancy, now is the time to work toward improving your health and resolving any current health concerns, such as working toward a healthy weight for your build, getting diabetes under control, seeing a specialist if there are any endocrine issues (thyroid, PCOS, etc.) that can be treated now, reducing or eliminating environmental toxins and cleaning chemicals, and researching the pregnancy diet and supplements that are recommended for your needs. An early pregnancy class might benefit you, to let you know what preventative measures can be taken for best health for you and baby prenatally, and another comprehensive birth class later in the pregnancy if you have not already attended one.</div>
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<a href="http://VBACfacts.com/">VBACfacts.com</a> is a great source for statistics on VBAC vs. ERCS. Its owner periodically offers online classes for parents who are preparing for VBAC.</div>
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Moms who choose a repeat cesarean may choose options for a <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/02/how-to-have-natural-cesarean.html" target="_blank">family centered cesarean</a>, but that's another blog post.</div>
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I hope this gives you a place to start your research! Please let me know if I can serve you with preparing info for a private (in person or via Skype) or group class for you, whether it's info on TTC, for a healthy low-risk pregnancy to increase your odds of vaginal birth, and/or birth class for later pregnancy. I specialize in informed options.</div>
Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-32676617477532019812012-08-10T11:12:00.000-04:002012-08-10T11:12:36.294-04:00Pacifier clip = teether tether. You're welcome.Why did it take me 5 children before I figured this out? Regardless, here's a little lifesaver for you. Use a pacifier clip as a teether tether and never lose another teether (or small toy).<br />
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I'm sure some of you figured this out before your 5th child. How many of you have tried this before? What other ridiculously simple, "a-ha!" tricks have made getting out and about with baby a little easier?Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-3848696149367995682012-08-07T15:15:00.002-04:002012-08-07T16:49:22.602-04:002 Mommy Necklaces Giveaway! (Ends 8-21-12)I'm so excited to offer you not just one, but TWO beautiful, practical Mommy Necklaces up for giveaway! I contacted Raelynn Hughes, to ask her for her business cards for my clients, since I love my Mommy Necklaces so much, and Raelynn generously provided an Ambience Dangling Donut Mommy Necklace and a Nourish Rainbow Necklace with 5 extra rings, to match your outfit!
For the record, Mommy Necklaces did not provide me with any of my personal Mommy Necklaces. I paid full retail for some of them, and received others as gifts from my friend. I'm not being compensated in any way for my review. I really believe in Mommy Necklaces (MN)! I own 7 Mommy Necklaces so far, which is a pretty good start to my collection.<br />
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Several of my friends had MNs before me, and raved about how sturdy they are, how high quality, how on-trend, and how comfortable they are. They are "Jewelry, Justified." MNs are strong, lightweight, and designed with you in mind: meant to be worn with little sweethearts tugging on them. One of their signature features is their "breakaway clasp" that is designed to come apart if your little one is tugging very hard at the necklace, as an extra insurance that your MN will not break. Read <a href="http://www.mommynecklaces.com/Unique_ep_65-1.html">here</a> to see more benefits of Mommy Necklaces.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Left: Ambience Mommy Necklace Dangling Donut & Strand: Center: Nourish Mommy Necklace & 5 ring set.<br />
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Up for giveaway are two beautiful, durable Mommy Necklaces.<br />
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Ambience Dangling Donut Strand, 32", which can be worn with the Donut, or without it, as a chic strand necklace. $27.50 retail value.<br />
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Nourish Necklace for feeding time fiddlers, a must-have accessory for moms whose babies twiddle, pinch, or are easily distracted. Included is a set of 5 rings to wear on the Nourish Necklace, one at a time or in combination to match your outfit. Retail value $25.<br />
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Love these necklaces and want to buy one now, or in a different color? Dangling Donut Mommy Necklace collections are available <a href="http://www.mommynecklaces.com/Collective_p_1085.html">here</a>, and Nourish Mommy Necklace selections are available <a href="http://www.mommynecklaces.com/Nourish-Necklace_p_492.html">here</a>.<br />
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Thanks again to Mommy Necklaces for their generosity!<br />
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Winners, I'd love to see a pic of you wearing your necklace, if you have a chance to upload a pic to Well Rounded Birth Prep and/or Mommy Necklace Facebook Wall or Tweet it to us!<br />
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<strong style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">ENTRY RULES:</strong></div>
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<li style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">The only way to enter is through the Rafflecopter app below.</li>
<li style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">All steps must be completed to qualify for an entry (I will verify each one.)</li>
<li style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">This giveaway is open for US and Canada.</li>
<li style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">You MUST use a valid, accessible email to enter. If I can’t contact you, you can’t win!</li>
<li style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Giveaway ends at midnight on August 21. Winner will be announced August 22.</li>
<li style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">You have 7 days to respond, otherwise another winner will be drawn.</li>
<li style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;">Contest is void where prohibited.</li>
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<a class="rafl" href="http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/750e250/" id="rc-750e250" rel="nofollow">a Rafflecopter giveaway</a>
<script src="//d12vno17mo87cx.cloudfront.net/embed/rafl/cptr.js"></script>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-46461639583227232062012-05-07T13:50:00.000-04:002012-05-07T13:55:36.280-04:006 y.o. son wants to be a lactation consultant (video)My 6 year old son informed me that he wants to help mommies nurse their babies when he grows up. He has encouraged me as I nurse his baby brother, and he himself weaned at an age that we'll call "well into his toddler years." He remembers nursing and I'm thankful that he knows that breastfeeding is the biological norm. I'm pretty sure that he isn't aware that an alternative feeding method exists.<br />
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He has heard me on the phone, consulting with moms who need breastfeeding info and support. When he started telling me what he wants to do when he grows up (in addition to the other things he wants to do when he grows up, like being a superhero, owning a bakery like on Cake Boss, and winning bike races), I recorded it and here's the result. It's heartwarming (to me, anyway) and too cute (in my biased, humble opinion.) He'll be a wonderful, supportive husband and daddy someday.<br />
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Have your kids ever talked about helping mommies learn to nurse?<br />
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<br />Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-76546869751164332172012-04-05T00:57:00.000-04:002012-04-05T00:59:41.708-04:00WV DHHR wants to know what I think about WV birthsI was "randomly selected" to receive a questionnaire on the health of mothers and babies in WV. "PRAMS: Pregnancy Risk Assessment Monitoring System. You can help improve the health of West Virginia babies," the cover states. WV Department of Health & Human Resources sponsors the questionnaire.<br />
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An aside. I do find it a bit odd that 1 out of 14 WV new mothers receive the questionnaire, yet I received one following my 2008 homebirth as well. Coincidence?<br />
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Most of the questions were multiple choice or yes/no demographic questions or asking about health during the pregnancy, whether I had insurance, whether I smoked or drank or took vitamins, whether my baby was in NICU, etc.<br />
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At the end was this gem. "Please use this space for any additional comments you would like to make about the health of mothers and babies in West Virginia." Why, I don't mind if I do.<br />
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Here's what I wrote. I could have done better with time to prepare, but I wanted to get it finished and in the mail.<br />
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WV has the 5th highest cesarean rate in the US, 36.3%. (cesareanrates.com) The World Health Organization has stated that the cesarean rate should never exceed 15% or else more harm is being done than good. Clearly, WV's cesarean rate is adversely affecting the health of mothers and babies through both preventable mortality and morbidity.<br />
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"According to the World Health Organization, midwives should be the preferred medical caregiver for low-risk pregnant women, reserving OB-GYN's for high-risk pregnancies for emergency birth complications only." (http://www.choicesinchildbirth.com/Choose_Your_Medical_Caregiver.html)<br />
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World Health Organization "Definition of the Midwife," 1992:<br />
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"The most appropriate person to care for pregnant women is someone with midwifery skills who lives close to the community. People trained in midwifery are qualified to provide preventive care to pregnant women, detect abnormal conditions in mothers and infants, assist women through labor and delivery and prescribe essential drugs. When delivery complications arise, those providing midwifery care especially at the community level- need to be able to carry out emergency measures if medical help is absent and get medical assistance or refer women to an appropriate health facility."<br />
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The answer to safer, healthier pregnancies in WV and around the world, is MORE MIDWIVES, both in and out of hospitals. More midwives means huge savings in healthcare dollars, too.<br />
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Following the 6 recommendations for the safest birth possible (as recommended by the World Health Organization) would dramatically improve outcomes:<br />
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1. Let labor begin on its own.<br />
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2. Walk, move around, and change positions throughout labor.<br />
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3. Bring a loved one, friend, or doula for continuous support.<br />
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4. Avoid interventions that are not medically necessary.<br />
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5. Avoid giving birth on your back, and follow your body's urges to push.<br />
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6. Keep your baby with you--it's best for you, your baby, and breastfeeding.<br />
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Details, free videos and print materials at mothersadvocate.org.<br />
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* WV MOMS DESERVE EVIDENCE-BASED CARE. * Their babies--our babies--depend on it.<br />
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This is what I wrote on the back of the return envelope.<br />
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I don't know how to rotate that, so here's what it says.<br />
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"WV cesarean rate: 36.3%<br />
World Health Organization max recommended cesarean rate: 15%"<br />
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"Treating normal labors as though they were complicated can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. --Rooks"<br />
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<i>What would YOU say in the write-in section about the health of mothers and babies and birth in your state/region?</i>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-62572367388333391532012-01-29T15:38:00.003-05:002012-01-29T17:50:22.481-05:00Our Christmas Eve home waterbirth storyI've really wanted to write up this birth story, but it seems so big, too daunting to even begin. I've felt that way with each of my births. I'll give it a shot anyway.<br />
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Quick backstory:<br />
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<li>2002 Hospital birth of our 1st baby. Unmedicated birth as was my goal, but hospital routines that were not appropriate for my situation led to very difficult and painful recovery. </li>
<li>2004 Our 1st home waterbirth with midwives. I had sought a different model of care with this pregnancy to prevent the problems and pain that happened with my first birth. Healing birth.</li>
<li>2006 Our 2nd home waterbirth with midwives. </li>
<li>2007 Missed miscarriage followed by D&C at 14 weeks 5 days. Devastating.</li>
<li>2008 Our 3rd home waterbirth. Accidental unassisted birth. Long story.</li>
<li>2011 Here we go again... You can see my posts from this pregnancy <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/search/label/5th%20baby">here.</a></li>
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*****DISCLAIMER: THIS IS A BIRTH STORY. PLEASE CLOSE THIS TAB IF YOU ARE NOT PREPARED TO READ ABOUT DETAILS OF PREGNANCY AND BIRTH.**********</div>
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I will also upload (modest) photos from my labor and birth, but these are still labor and birth photos. If you are uncomfortable discussing cervical dilation and how to keep a perineum intact during pushing, please don't read further instead of leaving bizarre comments or telling me that I overshared. Mkay?</div>
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Who's who:<br />
me: Sarah DeGroff<br />
hubby: Rick DeGroff<br />
doula: Tara Gilkey, DONA<br />
midwives: Angy Nixon, CNM, and Dorothy Kaeck, CPM<br />
apprentice midwife: Pia Long, DONA </div>
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I was at a prenatal checkup at my midwife's house on Wed. Dec. 21 when I had a bit of bloody show. How exciting! I was 39.5 weeks along, and hoped that would mean onset of labor within the next few days, although I have a friend who had steady bloody show for two full weeks before labor began at 41 weeks along. I really hoped I wouldn't have to wait two weeks, but I was prepared to wait until baby was ready on his own time.</div>
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The next few days were spent nesting with joyful anticipation. I had set a salon nail appointments for myself, my mom, and my 7 year old daughter for that evening, and I hoped that getting a pedicure would be all my body needed to let little man arrive. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">My 7 y.o. daughter's and my pedicures. We have sparkly snowflakes painted on our big toes.</span></td></tr>
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My hubby took me out to eat after that (while my mom watched our kids), our last date without kids for a lonnnngggg time.</div>
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The next day, I got my hair cut, since that hadn't been done since mid-September. A girl can only go so long without having her bangs trimmed.</div>
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The next day was my mom's last day with us. (She had come to stay Monday through Friday to help cook and fill my freezer with postpartum meals. A wonderful gift!) I had kind of thought that I would go into labor as soon as I got my mom out of the house because I am rather private about who is around me during my labors and births. I would have felt self-conscious with mom there. </div>
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After 3 days of continual bloody show and Braxton Hicks contractions that got gradually more intense and crampy, I did start having stronger and longer contractions as soon as my mom hit the road at 4 p.m. on Friday Dec. 23. I put together my <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/12/labor-music-reducing-pain-perception.html">labor music playlist</a>, made <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/12/red-raspberry-leaf-teapunch-popsicles.html">red raspberry leaf iced tea/punch</a> and RRL punch popsicles, readied last minute birth supplies and snacks, and headed to bed at a decent hour. (I loved my labor playlist throughout my labor, but the playlist needed to have been twice as long! It was on repeat for a l.o.n.g. time.)<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3PJchZX4pk4/Tw9VsH-ONWI/AAAAAAAAAYM/qNdWduYCQ1c/s1600/IMG_0010.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3PJchZX4pk4/Tw9VsH-ONWI/AAAAAAAAAYM/qNdWduYCQ1c/s400/IMG_0010.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Prelabor/ super early labor, evening of Dec. 23, about 24 hours before the birth. Putting together my labor song playlist on Rick's iPad, from my notes on that notebook next to it.</span></td></tr>
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All night long, I awoke with contractions that were intense enough to wake me up. I had to get on hands and knees over my wedge pillow that I slept on to prevent reflux. I intensely wanted Rick to provide counterpressure on my sacroiliac joints, pressing straight down. Occasionally, I would time my contractions using my ContractionMaster.com iPhone app, but since they didn't seem to be getting closer together, I mostly just tried to sleep in between contractions. All night long, they were from 6 to 30 minutes in frequency (averaging 10-13 minutes apart), averaging from 50 to 90 seconds each, and varying in intensity. I knew that since they were so sporadic, it likely meant things were still very early, and that it could indicate malpositioning. Baby had been ROT for my entire last trimester and it seemed that he was still ROT, judging by where I felt his movements. (ROT = <a href="http://spinningbabies.com/baby-positions/all-positions/right-occiput-transverse">Right Occiput Transverse</a>, meaning head-down with his spine aligned with my right side, facing my left side.) I wondered if his head was <a href="http://spinningbabies.com/baby-positions/all-positions/asynclitism">asynclitic</a> (head tilted slightly toward his shoulder), a malpositioning which often is responsible for irregular contractions, abnormally long contractions for the stage of labor, contractions that are more intense and painful than they should be for that stage of labor, and piggybacked contractions, which started late morning.<br />
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Even though the contractions were as far apart as they were, they were definitely intense and painful enough to want support through them. I found myself watching the clock to see when it would be "late" enough to reasonably call my doula, Tara. Her family lives not far from us, and she basically had to drive by our house to get to her family's house on Christmas Eve, so she had already planned on stopping by to check on me and visit for a bit on Christmas Eve, even if I hadn't been in labor. I wanted to see if she could come earlier to spell Rick for a bit so he could get something to eat, feed our four kids and spend a little bit of time with them, and help me get my grounding. I called Tara around 6:15 a.m. and filled her in. She said she would come over after getting everything ready for her husband and kids to be able to head to her family's house later in the day.<br />
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At that point, I figured I was up for the day and took a long shower in the dark by candlelight, letting the water and my playlist soothe me while I let Rick sleep. The water was very soothing to me. I still needed to be in a forward leaning position during contractions, slowly swaying back and forth, and I found that singing along with my playlist during contractions helped me have a relaxed jaw per Ina May Gaskin's recommendations ("As above, so below. An open, relaxed jaw means an open cervix.") A friend had mentioned that during her labor, having familiar songs helped her cope with contractions because she knew the lyrics and it gave her a known in a time of unknown. Maybe it was because I read that, or maybe it would have happened anyway, but I, too, found comfort in my early labor in the familiar lyrics. It gave me something to do, something to focus on other than the contractions.<br />
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My plan had been to do a #twitterbirth and post my updates as things progressed (with my doula tweeting for me after I could no longer do so myself), but I was afraid to post that my contractions were more intense or that I had called my doula in, because my contractions were still so erratic. I knew that this was either very early labor or possibly prelabor, but that didn't change the fact that I needed support through these contractions. I didn't want to feel like a watched pot then be embarrassed later if I had to admit publicly that I had called in labor support all for nothing, so I just waited to see what would happen. It was low key and no pressure, since Tara had to drive that direction for her family gathering anyway, so she told me she would hang out with me for a few hours and help me get comfortable, then we would play it by ear. If I needed her to stay, she would. If my contractions slowed down or still weren't in any discernible pattern, she would go on to her family gathering and come back whenever I called her.<br />
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Tara got to our house around 10:30 a.m. and took over labor support so Rick could tend to our kids. They both made sure I had enough to eat and drink. By this time, I wanted my electric heating pad on my lower back along with SI countersupport with each contraction. Throughout my labor, I needed to be forward leaning during contractions, either on hands and knees, sitting on the birth ball and leaning forward onto my bed, or standing and leaning onto my bed or onto the bathroom counter. It makes sense that those were the positions that felt right to me, because those positions help babies rotate, especially if they're posterior or transverse (but head-down).<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Wg392pNg7JE/TxtkQNAHiQI/AAAAAAAAAYg/N8580zLBTsU/s1600/IMG_1567.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Wg392pNg7JE/TxtkQNAHiQI/AAAAAAAAAYg/N8580zLBTsU/s400/IMG_1567.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Early labor, maybe 11 a.m. Forward leaning, sitting on the birth ball. Heating pad on my back. Eating Greek yogurt, enjoying distraction from my 3 y.o., and writing my blog on RRL tea labor punch.</td></tr>
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Tara suggested wrapping my belly with her rebozo, a thin scarf-like fabric which has many uses in helping get babies better positioned in labor. I wish I had a photo, just for reference, but basically she spread the fabric across my midsection from hips to ribs and tied it tightly behind my back to help lift and bind my belly, to help baby get repositioned. We left this on for an hour or two, then I decided to get in my tub for a bit to try to get my uterus to relax from these long-lasting contractions. My uterus felt tight and painful even after contractions ended, sort of like a charley horse, and a bath can help with that.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IdIJ9jqYloE/Txtf7fKPnMI/AAAAAAAAAYY/6fOfg2s6_2A/s1600/IMG_1569.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-IdIJ9jqYloE/Txtf7fKPnMI/AAAAAAAAAYY/6fOfg2s6_2A/s400/IMG_1569.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">11:30 or noon? Trying to relax between contractions.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/--9zOJmouYv4/TyWZAzC4FwI/AAAAAAAAAZo/TXEUZRt724w/s1600/IMG_1573.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/--9zOJmouYv4/TyWZAzC4FwI/AAAAAAAAAZo/TXEUZRt724w/s400/IMG_1573.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">During contractions. Sacral counterpressure helped so much.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OY3xMlrFKg4/TyDqS9HVNlI/AAAAAAAAAY0/bY3RJXxx97U/s1600/candles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OY3xMlrFKg4/TyDqS9HVNlI/AAAAAAAAAY0/bY3RJXxx97U/s400/candles.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Candy cane scented candles to set a relaxing spa mood.</td></tr>
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I continued to eat and drink all day, everything from peanut butter crackers to apples with peanut butter, colby jack cheese cubes, toaster waffles, and chicken noodle soup (which I ate an entire bowl of about 30 minutes before I had my baby). I drank <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/12/red-raspberry-leaf-teapunch-popsicles.html">red raspberry leaf tea/punch</a> (and RRL popsicles--yum!). I needed the calories to keep my energy up.<br />
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Since I didn't know whether this was "really it" and whether I'd have the baby today, we didn't want to call and bother anyone on Christmas Eve to have them come help us with the kids, so they mostly fended for themselves, playing Wii and watching cartoons on Netflix. We let them open craft and game gifts every few hours to keep them occupied. Here they're opening a Wii Babysitting Mama game from uncles.<br />
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My contractions were still averaging 10 minutes apart, but they were painful enough and intense enough that I wanted labor support. Tara asked if I would be OK if she went to her family's Christmas Eve gathering with family 35 minutes away from my house, if my second midwife Dorothy came to be my labor support. Tara left around 12:30, and Dorothy got here around 4 p.m.<br />
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I'm not an advocate of routine vaginal exams in labor, but since my contractions were still in that same pattern, I asked Dorothy to check me around 4:30 p.m. Mid-morning, Tara and I had discussed how far along we thought I might be, and based on how intense and painful they were, we guessed 4-5 cm, and that had been hours before. At this point I was hoping Dorothy would tell me I was around 6 cm. Nope. 3 cm. You have GOT to be kidding me. Baby was -1 station and I was 80% effaced. I know that numbers don't technically mean anything, but this was discouraging. That's part of why routine vaginal exams in labor are such a bad idea. This wasn't what I would call routine, though, because we were trying to get info on what was going on with his position and what to do next, if anything.<br />
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I spent the afternoon in and out of the tub, in for a while to try to relax and take the edge off, then out for a while to encourage baby to rotate and descend, but all the while, on hands and knees or forward-leaning, with Rick or Dorothy pushing hard straight down on my SI joints. I felt a little self-conscious that I was having such a hard time coping with the pain of these contractions because neither Tara nor Dorothy had attended any of my previous births, so they had to take my word for it when I told them, "I really have done this 4 times before without an epidural, and this doesn't feel like it did before. I promise I'm not being a wuss. I really do know how to handle contractions." They laughed because they believed me and I didn't have to explain myself, but that's just me.</div>
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Since my contractions were far apart and in an ineffective pattern, the endorphins that usually bring a mom into LaborLand in a dreamlike state and help mom manage the pain, weren't there. I was in a conscious, alert state throughout the labor. I'm guessing that the endorphins weren't sustained enough from one contraction to the next to be able to produce the LaborLand effect.It sounds like a treat, on paper, when I tell people that my contractions averaged 10 minutes apart for my entire labor, but there's a reason it's not "supposed" to be that way typically. I've had it both ways, and LaborLand is FAR more manageable. </div>
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I don't know how many hours it went like this, but for maybe 4 hours, my contractions were painful enough that they felt like transition. I kept telling Dorothy, "I don't know what's going on with this, but I cannot get on top of the pain." One birth affirmation I tell my childbirth class students is "I can do anything for a minute and a half," which is the average amount of time of contractions during transition, the hardest and most intense part of labor. Since my contractions were piggybacking, they totaled 3-4 minutes (combined) and that mantra wasn't cutting it. Dorothy told me, "Just keep breathing. All you have to do is breathe." That made sense to me and was exactly what I needed to hear. I couldn't get on top of the pain, but I didn't have to. All I had to do was keep breathing. I was vocalizing loudly through these contractions, moaning out the pain. Dorothy matched me through the toughest ones, and it helped a lot. I found I felt most right on hands and knees in my tub, with my feet braced against the wall of the tub during my contractions, rocking forward and backward a bit with my contractions.</div>
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More challenging to me than the physical pain and demands of my labor was the mental game, knowing that I was "only" 3 cm and "only" in "early" labor. If I had thought it was almost over, I'd have been fine, but I started getting discouraged and crying because I didn't know how I'd make it through if I had 12 hours more of this. Rick had been texting my other (former) midwife, Jennifer Stewart, who had worked with my primary midwife Angy at all my other births. Jennifer moved to California to work at a birth center in November and I was so sad that she couldn't be at this birth. She was not only the midwife who caught my 2nd and 3rd babies, but she is also one of my closest friends. Rick filled Jennifer in on what had been going on, so she called when I was between contractions to try to encourage and buoy me. I don't even remember what she told me. I was a little preoccupied. I had to hang up on her when another one came.</div>
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As it approached 8 p.m., Dorothy told me I needed to decide what I wanted to do. I had been up a lot the night before and hadn't gotten much sleep, and I was getting tired and discouraged from all day of labor like this. I could A) try to speed the contractions up and get into a better pattern, B) try to slow the contractions down with either 2 Benadryl or half a glass of wine and catch a nap so we could start fresh and maybe things would be more effective after that, or C) do nothing to change it, and just take it as it comes. My hips hurt too bad from SPD to go up and down the stairs to try to speed labor up. I had been upright a lot and changing positions. I lean toward wanting to let labor chart its own course and take option C) and just see what happens, but I asked her to check me again to gather what info we could for decision-making. I had told her that I really didn't want her to go because I felt like once my contractions firmed up and once my little man got into position, it would all be over, and she wouldn't make it back in time. (Like I said, I had an accidental unassisted birth with my last baby due to the fact that I had a long prelabor and early labor, didn't recognize it once contractions did get more intense and was in denial of transition, and I did not want another unassisted birth.) Dorothy said that if I hadn't made progress, she wouldn't leave me. She would sleep on the couch all night if she had to.</div>
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I got out of the tub so I could waddle to my bed to allow Dorothy to check me. The bath water was getting too cool for comfort at that point anyway, so it was time to drain the tub. Then I did something really smart. I asked Rick to go ahead and fill the tub again. He was skeptical because we had been talking about trying to back off on focus on labor since I "wasn't making much progress" and we were going to watch A Christmas Story since it's on TV on some channel for 24 hours straight on Christmas Eve every year. Here's what I told him, verbatim: "Water is cheap." I was afraid that once the urge to push came upon me, whenever that was, if the tub wasn't full already, we wouldn't have time for the tub to fill. I told him that if we need to drain it and fill it again, we could, but I would feel safer knowing it was ready. This turned out to be very important.</div>
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I arranged myself on my wedge-shaped pillow that I slept on every night to prevent reflux, and Dorothy checked me. She said that I was now at 5 cm, my cervix was still pretty thick and not very stretchy, and baby was a bit lower, maybe +1 now. I asked her to do Leopold's maneuvers to determine if he was still ROT position as we had suspected. I had to change positions again to move on the bed to a spot with enough room to lie flat for this. She confirmed that he was still ROT. Since I had made some progress, she called all of our birth team to tell them to go ahead and come. Dorothy would begin charting and auscultation (listening to fetal heart tones with the Doppler). She went to her van to get her birth bag with all her equipment, oxygen tank, etc. I got up and grabbed my laptop so I could tweet this:</div>
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I also posted on my Facebook page, "Maybe baby tonight?" with a link to my Twitter. </div>
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Something in all that changing positions that I had just done helped baby get his head right where he needed to be, because as soon as I stood up after that, I told Dorothy something felt different and I thought I'd need to push soon. It was a feeling of impending dread almost, sort of like when you know you're going to have to throw up, it's just a matter of time. I waddled back to the bathroom. The timeline is blurry. Rick asked if he should turn on the video recorder I had set up on a tripod. I said yes but I knew there wouldn't be enough light. Rick tried turning on the light in the adjoining powder room and leaving the door cracked, but the light was unbearably painful for me. I've read about the importance of having dark during labor, pushing, and postpartum, but this was the first time I had felt that on such a primal level. I told him I didn't care that we wouldn't be able to see the video, just TURN THE LIGHT OFF. (We had 5 votive candles from the pic above as our only light, other than a bit of light coming in from the bedroom.)</div>
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With my births, I don't have an "active pushing stage" per se so much as Dr. Michel Odent's definition of <a href="http://www.wombecology.com/fetusejection.html">Fetus Ejection Reflex</a>. My body does it for me, and I have little or no control over pushing. I can try to slow it down so that my tissues have time to gently stretch, but no guarantees. I got in the tub, and with the next contraction, I was pushing. I couldn't find a position that felt right, though. I felt cornered, panicked. I tried squatting, I tried a kneeling lunge, nothing felt right. Eventually I ended up sitting on Rick's hands like a hammock. Dorothy asked Rick if he wanted to catch, but he couldn't because I was sitting on his hands. Baby emerged like a train coming. Thankfully, I didn't tear (well, a tiny surface tear that didn't need a stitch). That goes to show you what your body can do when birth is instinctive. He cried very quickly after the birth, and his APGARs were 9 and 10.</div>
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No wonder it felt so intense. I went from 5 cm and a thick cervix, to baby out, in 14 minutes, including only 4 minutes of pushing. Take THAT, Friedman's Curve!</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7D7zDbFnWqc/TyWVdZGyKNI/AAAAAAAAAZQ/1qGldGEo33g/s1600/tub.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7D7zDbFnWqc/TyWVdZGyKNI/AAAAAAAAAZQ/1qGldGEo33g/s400/tub.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That was crazy intense. I'm so glad he's out!</td></tr>
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We heard a knock at the bedroom door, and our kids said, "We heard the baby cry, can we come in now?" We let them in. I pushed the placenta out then it was time for our 5 year old to cut the cord. This was "his" job that he had asked for more than 6 months prior. It was very special. I don't have a great pic of him cutting the cord, just this pic taken from above, but it captured the moment of how many people were next to my tub. It was a little hectic, but I was glad that my kids could be a part of this.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Hycl1PC3Bd8/TyWW1jgkaXI/AAAAAAAAAZY/Hm0zyTl7BBw/s1600/IMG_1581.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Hycl1PC3Bd8/TyWW1jgkaXI/AAAAAAAAAZY/Hm0zyTl7BBw/s400/IMG_1581.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My hubby is holding baby while our 5 y.o. cuts the cord, and the others watch, fascinated.</td></tr>
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The other midwives and my doula were en route when I gave birth and arrived just in time to do all the newborn assessments. One of the wonderful benefits of a homebirth is the ability to shower (in my own shower) then cuddle up in my jammies with my baby in my own bed. </div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-oUnLNgQkOUc/TyWavUgrAOI/AAAAAAAAAZw/xc6iwruPNfI/s1600/IMG_1588.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-oUnLNgQkOUc/TyWavUgrAOI/AAAAAAAAAZw/xc6iwruPNfI/s400/IMG_1588.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">First nursing. It's a team effort.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Xj8Gnk1-MvA/TyWkHV3YJOI/AAAAAAAAAaA/_RhBnLYT2ic/s1600/IMG_1593.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Xj8Gnk1-MvA/TyWkHV3YJOI/AAAAAAAAAaA/_RhBnLYT2ic/s400/IMG_1593.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My 7 y.o.'s job was to help weigh and announce his weight. 8 lb 10 oz! My second-largest baby.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sweet little (peeling) feet.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My 9 y.o.'s job was to help measure him and announce his length. 21 1/2", so tall! No wonder I was so uncomfortable.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My midwife Dorothy who caught him.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UbD1XUgBJuw/TyWnGkA6qGI/AAAAAAAAAao/AjfCNwk3zic/s1600/IMG_1617.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UbD1XUgBJuw/TyWnGkA6qGI/AAAAAAAAAao/AjfCNwk3zic/s400/IMG_1617.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Watching the newborn assessments.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-aQcF4lcIqzQ/TyWowDHaEJI/AAAAAAAAAaw/7fajtsWcBlU/s1600/IMG_1619.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-aQcF4lcIqzQ/TyWowDHaEJI/AAAAAAAAAaw/7fajtsWcBlU/s400/IMG_1619.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sign of the times. Daddy doing FaceTime with his brother & parents so they could see the baby.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-HhyhhJfQtVY/TyWq4rbR4VI/AAAAAAAAAbA/3afMffgG0_k/s1600/team.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="298" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-HhyhhJfQtVY/TyWq4rbR4VI/AAAAAAAAAbA/3afMffgG0_k/s400/team.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The rest of my birth team: Doula Tara Gilkey, Midwife Apprentice Pia Long, and Midwife Angy Nixon.</td></tr>
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In retrospect, my midwives and I feel that baby's malpositioning was the result of my <a href="http://www.plus-size-pregnancy.org/pubicpain.htm">SPD</a>. His head couldn't easily find the right position and path due to my pelvic instability. It could have been so much worse, though! I understand even more fully now how and why so many malpositioned babies end up to be cesarean deliveries. When a baby is poorly positioned, it makes labor so much more painful, and if I had been in a hospital with an epidural, stuck on my back, I don't know how he would have found the path he needed to rotate and descend. I was so blessed to have him at home.<br />
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When I was recounting the events to a relative, and how intense and painful the contractions were, that I just could not get on top of the pain, she asked me if I was scared. I was glad she asked, because I hadn't thought of it in those terms, but I wasn't frightened at any point. I wasn't concerned that either my baby or I were in danger. I knew that we were safe and healthy, and that I had to just keep breathing.<br />
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As more time has passed since the birth, I look on it more and more fondly. I fully remember how much it hurt, but the great thing about unmedicated labor is that you feel 100% normal in between contractions. Plus, I felt like a million bucks as soon as he was out. Recovery has been a breeze. I feel strongly that it was necessary to give him the gift of the safest birth possible. It was totally worth it.<br />
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I feel that this birth was a perfect example of how <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlj9ehB-hLc">pain in labor does not have to equal suffering</a>.<br />
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We got to bed around normal time on Christmas Eve (midnight) and the kids let us sleep in until 8 a.m. We came downstairs and watched them open gifts. We were together as a family. I can't imagine what it would be like to be stuck in a hospital over Christmas.<br />
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This was a magical Christmas, our best Christmas ever.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xxBVqybkO4c/TyWtFRYyHfI/AAAAAAAAAbI/ypUAql9w0Bg/s1600/IMG_1635.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xxBVqybkO4c/TyWtFRYyHfI/AAAAAAAAAbI/ypUAql9w0Bg/s400/IMG_1635.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Christmas morning</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XVlYdDfp8iY/TyWtWnT5bQI/AAAAAAAAAbQ/YLuYMVa3plA/s1600/IMG_1632.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XVlYdDfp8iY/TyWtWnT5bQI/AAAAAAAAAbQ/YLuYMVa3plA/s400/IMG_1632.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Our other 4 blessings, ages 9, 7, 5, and 3. Christmas morning.</td></tr>
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You can see baby's newborn portraits <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2012/01/our-christmas-eve-baby-newborn.html">here</a>, including pics of him in a stocking wearing a Santa cap. Too cute.</div>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-83183657377160664232012-01-11T00:22:00.002-05:002012-01-11T00:23:27.138-05:00Artistic maternity portraits celebrating pregnant beauty<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 14px;">"When I am with child, I feel beautiful...not a vain beauty, but the beauty of the might of creation growing inside of me....the undeniable truth that something so amazing could only come from the hands of a mighty God. I love seeing my belly, feeling my belly and baby, & capturing all those beautiful changes that take place." ~Trebor Sutler</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 14px;">My best friend, Trebor Sutler, is due any day now with her 6th baby/5th birth. She has had an incredible journey to get where she is today, having been through what she describes as 2 preventable cesareans, then a challenging but victorious hospital VBAC, then her first home waterbirth on Christmas Day 3 years ago, and now awaiting her 3rd VBA2C/HBA2C.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 14px;">You can see her slideshow of her birth stories up to and including her 2008 home waterbirth <a href="http://www.archive.org/details/Birth..ifLetBe">here.</a></span><br />
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Trebor graciously shared her beautiful maternity portraits with us. (She photographed them herself! Isn't she multi-talented?) Trebor is always gorgeous, and I thought these photos especially captured her beauty and this special moment in her life. Pregnant bellies are so beautiful and miraculous.Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-28657379144649508622012-01-07T23:09:00.000-05:002012-01-07T23:29:47.461-05:00Baby's 1st outing: chiropractic adjustmentYes, my baby's first outing was to the chiropractor's office at three days old.<br />
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I had been getting weekly chiropractic adjustments since my first trimester with this pregnancy to help optimize fetal positioning, prevent or lessen SPD, and further reduce my risk of needing a cesarean. (Although I did still have SPD, I feel that the symptoms would have been far worse and more debilitating had I not had regular chiropractic care.) I couldn't wait to go back to get adjusted again after having my baby. I knew it would feel great! My friend Dawn met me there to hold baby while I got adjusted.<br />
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I also wanted for our chiropractor to assess baby to see whether he needed adjusted. Many babies do need chiropractic adjustment after birth, whether the birth was vaginal or cesarean, but especially if it was a challenging or difficult birth. Studies have shown that chiropractic adjustment can help correct babies' latch in some instances of breastfeeding difficulties, and that it can sometimes <a href="http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/27032407/detail.html">lessen symptoms of colic and reflux.</a><br />
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Here's a pic of our chiropractor adjusting baby on me. (He said that babies in this position on mother's tummy are most stable and content during their adjustment.)<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Baby's 1st chiropractic adjustment, 3 days old.</td></tr>
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What have been your experiences with chiropractic during pregnancy, labor, postpartum, and/or for your babies?<br />
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<br />Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-12305812671012584122012-01-07T00:47:00.003-05:002012-01-07T23:10:20.539-05:00Our Christmas Eve Baby: newborn portraits<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I finally figured out how to make a slideshow from the newborn portraits my best friendTrebor Sutler took of our Christmas Eve baby. These photos make me melt. I've never had nice newborn pictures with our other children, and I'm so glad to have them of Baby H with his brother and sisters.</div>
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Even though Trebor was 37 weeks pregnant herself, and even though Christmas Day was her 4th child's 3rd birthday, and even though she had gotten her entire family to church on Christmas morning, and she was undoubtedly exhausted, Trebor hauled herself over to visit me and Baby H on Christmas Day in the evening so we could get some good pictures taken and she could meet my little love. What a wonderful gift. Christmas truly was blessed for us.</div>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-37975783379968011132011-12-25T23:04:00.000-05:002011-12-25T23:04:43.141-05:00Countdown to Christmas Eve Baby!About a week before Thanksgiving, my kids and I constructed an advent chain of sorts to countdown the days until Christmas, since my due date was December 25/26. This gave my kids--especially the two younger ones--a more tangible way to understand how many days remained until Christmas, and, possibly, the approximate time until our baby would arrive. Of course, I fully expected that he would arrive closer to New Year, but it was still a good countdown for the children. It also helped me cope when I began to get impatient with the remaining time to wait for baby's arrival. When I looked at these paper strips, they didn't look like many, and the chain got noticeably shorter quickly. Here's our countdown chain a few weeks ago:<br />
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What a worthwhile wait. Look at our Christmas Eve baby! I can't wait to post his birth story and the few photos I have from that adventure.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He's so long he doesn't come close to fitting in this stocking! 21 1/2"</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">8 lb 10 oz means nice round cheeks/jowls on my newborn!</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Look how long he is! No wonder I was so uncomfortable. How did he fit inside me just yesterday???<br /><br />Photography by Trebor Sutler</td></tr>
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<br />Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-38481318311050576262011-12-24T11:23:00.001-05:002011-12-24T11:23:50.722-05:00Red Raspberry Leaf tea/punch & popsiclesRed raspberry leaf tea has many benefits for 3rd trimester expectant mommas, but of course, consult your care provider to see if it's appropriate for you, don't sue me, etc. <a href="http://www.birthsource.com/scripts/article.asp?articleid=127">Here's a link</a> where you can read about the uterine tonic and nutritional benefits of RRL tea.<br />
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My doula and monitrice friend Sarah Booten in Chicago (who is also the owner of <a href="https://www.facebook.com/InBloomMagazine">In Bloom magazine</a>) gave me this recipe for a tasty labor tea/punch that can also be used to make healthy labor popsicles. It has the herbal benefits (uterine tonic), nutritional bonus, and natural source of calories for energy in labor, minus the high fructose corn syrup and artificial colors and flavors in most popsicles.<br />
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<b>Red Raspberry Leaf Labor Punch</b><br />
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Strong-brewed red raspberry leaf tea, 1 pitcher (any amount)<br />
Equal amount of 100% apple juice (no sugar added)<br />
Honey to taste, optional<br />
1 lb. frozen red raspberries, crushed on kitchen counter when the bag is still sealed<br />
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I made 2 dozen labor popsicles and still had a substantially full iced tea pitcher of labor tea/punch. I hope you enjoy this recipe. It's a great drink or popsicle to take with you to the hospital or birth center, especially if your facility has restrictions on eating and drinking in labor. (I hope it does not, for a lot of reasons, <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/04/good-labor-snacks-and-why-moms-need.html">explained here.</a>)<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Not pictured: 100% apple juice</td></tr>
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<br />Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-33336275399957153662011-12-23T21:12:00.000-05:002011-12-23T22:18:19.501-05:00Labor music & reducing pain perceptionLots of mommas report that having their favorite music playing during labor and birth helps counteract the <a href="http://www.birthingnaturally.net/pain/theories.html">Fear-Tension-Pain cycle</a> and assist with lessening their perception of pain, helping make labor more manageable. What kind of music you'll want to have ready is totally personal. I find that most mommas prefer slow music for early through active labor (anything you could slow-dance to), but that slow instrumental music is frequently more relaxing as the mother approaches transition through pushing. The lyrics can be too distracting at that point. Of course, it's up to you. One momma told me that she had rave music playing throughout her entire unmedicated birth at a birth center. Whatever floats your boat.<br />
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Find out if your place of birth has a CD player in each room. If not (and not many do), be prepared to have your iPod, iPad, or other MP3 player ready *with speakers* since it's difficult to keep earbuds in place while changing positions frequently during labor. It also makes for nice ambiance for your labor partner and labor support team.<br />
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I started drafting my labor playlist on notebook paper six months ago. The list kept growing until I realized that not only could we not afford to download that many songs on iTunes, but also that by the time I realized it was active labor, I likely wouldn't even have time to listen to the entire playlist I had written up! I have shown my "dream" playlist to a few friends, all of whom commented on how eclectic and varied the genres of my picks were. I figured I'd post both my finalized list and my "dream" list for anyone looking for ideas. Anyone who likes the same music I do, that is. Otherwise, make sure you have your rave music ready to play. It's all good.<br />
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My final playlist, most of which we already had on iTunes:<br />
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<ul>
<li>"Don't Let Me Be Lonely Tonight" James Taylor</li>
<li>"Something in the Way She Moves" James Taylor</li>
<li>"You've Got a Friend" James Taylor</li>
<li>"Fire and Rain" James Taylor</li>
<li>"Sweet Baby James" James Taylor</li>
<li>"Carolina In My Mind" James Taylor</li>
<li>"Walking Man" James Taylor</li>
<li>"Daughters" John Mayer</li>
<li>"Don't Know Why" Norah Jones</li>
<li>"Try a Little Tenderness" Michael Buble</li>
<li>"More Than Words" Extreme</li>
<li>"Bed of Roses" Bon Jovi</li>
<li>"Kiss from a Rose" Seal</li>
<li>"She's Always a Woman" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"To Make You Feel My Love" Billy Joel ("Our song" played at our wedding)</li>
<li>"Lullaby (Goodnight, My Angel)" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"New York State of Mind" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"Shameless" Garth Brooks</li>
<li>"I Melt" Rascal Flatts</li>
<li>"When Can I See You" Babyface</li>
<li>"Take a Bow" Madonna</li>
<li>"Crazy For You" Madonna</li>
<li>"Forbidden Love" Madonna</li>
<li>"Love Don't Live Here Anymore" Madonna</li>
<li>"I'll Remember" Madonna</li>
<li>"One More Chance" Madonna</li>
<li>"Something to Remember" Madonna</li>
<li>"You'll See" Madonna</li>
<li>"Wicked Game" Chris Isaak</li>
<li>"Just the Two of Us" Grover Washington, Jr.</li>
<li>"Your Song" Elton John</li>
<li>"Tiny Dancer" Elton John</li>
<li>"Layla (Acoustic Version)" Eric Clapton</li>
<li>"Take it to the Limit" Eagles</li>
<li>"I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" Aerosmith</li>
<li>"Nothing Compares 2 U" Sinead O'Connor</li>
<li>"A Whiter Shade of Pale" Joe Cocker</li>
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Additional songs I'd have added if I felt like spending the cash:</div>
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<li>"Lucky" Jason Mraz</li>
<li>"Waiting on the World to Change" John Mayer</li>
<li>"Body is a Wonderland" John Mayer</li>
<li>"Isn't She Lovely" Stevie Wonder</li>
<li>"When a Man Loves a Woman" Percy Sledge</li>
<li>"Givin' Him Something He Can Feel" En Vogue</li>
<li>"Let's Get it On" Rascal Flatts or Marvin Gaye</li>
<li>"Let's Stay Together" Al Green</li>
<li>"Easy" Commodores</li>
<li>"Desperado" Eagles</li>
<li>"Hotel California" Eagles</li>
<li>"Best of My Love" Eagles</li>
<li>"Wasted Time" Eagles</li>
<li>"One of These Nights" Eagles</li>
<li>"I Can't Tell You Why" Eagles</li>
<li>"Landslide (Acoustic)" Fleetwood Mac</li>
<li>"Rhiannon" Fleetwood Mac</li>
<li>"Angel" Aerosmith</li>
<li>"What it Takes" Aerosmith</li>
<li>"The One" Elton John</li>
<li>"I Want Love" Elton John</li>
<li>"The Way You Look Tonight" Elton John</li>
<li>"Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" Elton John</li>
<li>"Patience" Guns & Roses</li>
<li>"Knockin on Heaven's Door" Guns & Roses</li>
<li>"Weak" SWV</li>
<li>"Must Have Been Love" Roxette</li>
<li>"Faithfully" Journey</li>
<li>"Lights" Journey</li>
<li>"Open Arms" Journey</li>
<li>"When You Love a Woman" Journey</li>
<li>"Strange Magic" ELO</li>
<li>"Careless Whisper" George Michael</li>
<li>"Sara Smile" Hall & Oates</li>
<li>"Vision of Love" Mariah Carey</li>
<li>"Open Arms" Mariah Carey</li>
<li>"Can't Let Go" Mariah Carey</li>
<li>"Without You" Mariah Carey</li>
<li>"I Still Believe" Mariah Carey</li>
<li>"My All" Mariah Carey</li>
<li>"I'll Be There" Mariah Carey</li>
<li>"Fragile" Sting</li>
<li>"When We Dance" Sting</li>
<li>"In the Air Tonight" Phil Collins</li>
<li>"Rain" Madonna</li>
<li>"Just the Way You Are" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"Honesty" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"Leave a Tender Moment Alone" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"She's Got a Way" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"And So It Goes" Billy Joel</li>
<li>"Into Temptation" Crowded House</li>
</ul>
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And for transition onward, if the lyrics of slow music are too distracting, I plan on playing Pandora Radio channel for Pachelbel's Canon in D (another song played at our wedding). </div>
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<i>Did you have music playing during your labor and/or birth? What music did you prepare ahead of time? Did you end up wanting what you thought you would want?</i></div>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-27572817803201917482011-12-19T23:04:00.001-05:002011-12-19T23:08:04.344-05:0039 wks basketball in mah belleh<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Yes, I'm aware that I waddle. I know that I don't walk terribly well. I realize that I must not have much longer, by the looks of things. No, I do not need any commentary about how I look like I might pop (or worse--explode) any minute now. Who ever thought it was a good idea to compare childbirth to explosions? Not a positive mental image, people!<br />
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And before anyone is tempted to get me started, <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/08/wide-variety-of-healthy-and-normal.html">read this</a> before any thoughts of commenting on how you think I'm big as a house or must be carrying twins (I'm not, and I'm not).<br />
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I'm still seeing my chiropractor weekly. Who knows how bad my <a href="http://www.plus-size-pregnancy.org/pubicpain.htm">SPD</a> and SI issues would be if I weren't. It's pretty bad as is, and I know that chiropractic is helping. I've been drinking Earth Mama Angel Baby <a href="http://www.earthmamaangelbaby.com/pregnancy/third-trimester-tea.html">Third Trimester Tea</a> every night before bed. That's been a fun countdown, watching my stock of it dwindle.<br />
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I just found out that I'm GBS positive, so I have to decide what course of action to take (or not to take). As of right now, I'm likely to take the course of treatment based on risk factors as opposed to prophylactically, considering the <a href="http://summaries.cochrane.org/CD007467/intrapartum-antibiotics-for-known-maternal-group-b-streptococcal-colonization">Cochrane Review</a> of the research on GBS and IV antibiotics in labor.<br />
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I guess that's all the news for now. I'm just hanging out, waiting for Christmas or labor, whichever comes first. It's a little bit hard to wait, knowing it *could* be tonight, but it *could* be 3 more weeks. It does make it easier to wait, having so much to do. I haven't even started wrapping gifts and I have a ton of nesting to do, so I'm content to wait on my son's timing. (Even if I weren't content to wait, I wouldn't evict him without pressing proof of medical need to do so, in case you were wondering. <a href="http://childbirthconnection.org/article.asp?ck=10652">Here's why.</a>)Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-56522494252240713162011-12-14T22:43:00.002-05:002011-12-19T23:07:41.833-05:00What we sacrifice for our growing babies: dignityI remember a post by Gina Crosley-Corcoran (<a href="http://thefeministbreeder.com/">The Feminist Breeder</a>) shortly after she had her daughter this past April, in which she rocked a motorized cart scooting around Target, nursing her baby, 2 or 3 days postpartum. That mental picture stuck with me and reminded me that there are times to swallow our pride and get on a motorized cart when the time calls for it.<br />
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That time, for me, is now. I have SPD, <a href="http://www.birthsource.com/scripts/article.asp?articleid=189">symphysis pubis dysfunction</a>, which, in a nutshell, is intense pelvic/hip pain due to pregnancy hormones. It will self-resolve after delivery, but for now, my hips hurt constantly, whether I'm moving or stationary. [If you suffer from pregnancy SPD, here is Kmom's article on recognizing, coping with, and alleviating <a href="http://www.plus-size-pregnancy.org/pubicpain.htm">symptoms of SPD</a>. It's the most comprehensive I've read.] Walking and climbing stairs are difficult and painful. A big trip to Walmart to stock up on all the stuff I won't have time to get after the baby is here? Nearly impossible. That is, unless I suck it up and use a motorized cart.<br />
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Like so.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BxY3_dKyv7M/TullZ6k2LFI/AAAAAAAAAWY/fSic1qHDQbE/s1600/walmart+cart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BxY3_dKyv7M/TullZ6k2LFI/AAAAAAAAAWY/fSic1qHDQbE/s400/walmart+cart.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My dignity is GONE.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
A sweet friend offered to watch my children for the afternoon so that I could get this huge shopping trip done, and that time is precious and rare, so I had to take advantage of it. Fortunately, one of my dear friend's daughters, Katey (who is also a sweet friend and our favorite babysitter), was able to come with me to help on short notice, or else I wouldn't have been able to do this trip at all. I needed her to push the actual buggies while I motored on this awesome cart and quickly filled its little basket.<br />
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(For the record, I don't like giving my business to Walmart, and I'm not proud of publicly admitting that I shop there, but in this life stage, multiple shopping trips to various small(er) businesses is not a possibility.) (Also for the record, we were not buying alcohol in this aisle, although I can see how it would look that way if you look at the background. We were there to get bottled water, which, also, for the record, I don't use often, but wanted to have around for quick access in labor for myself and my midwives and doula, as well as for company.)<br />
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Katey and I filled two full size buggies completely full, plus the little basket in my cart with laundry detergent, dish detergent, toilet paper, paper towels, canned food, string cheese, frozen waffles, light bulbs, coffee, a vaporizer/humidifier for the kids' room, diapers for my three-year-old, and, yes, as you can see by this VERY candid photo, postpartum maxi pads. And, yes, that is a donut in my hand, because by this time, I AM A PREGNANCY CLICHE. I may as well revel in it.<br />
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I was in a motorized cart, 38 weeks pregnant, eating a donut, and wearing my "good" sweatpants along with my widest sneakers.<br />
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My total for this stock-up was $580, the most I've ever spent at one time (not counting house, vehicle or furniture). I was grateful for multiple Walmart gift cards and payment for teaching several Well Rounded Birth Prep classes lately, which covered 2/3 of that bill. Now I'm one big step closer to feeling ready for baby. The weather was mild, and the timing was perfect. I'm so glad I got the job done. Even if it meant wondering if I was a public spectacle or if someone was taking my picture for peopleofwalmart.com. (Don't even THINK about submitting this on there.)<br />
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What about you? Have any of you had to resort to using a motorized cart to get around when shopping at the end of pregnancy? A few of my friends said they had. How was it for you?Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-91917110059781511912011-12-03T22:47:00.001-05:002011-12-03T23:04:17.021-05:0037 weeks pregnant belly pic<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-F7WBtT7YkUw/TtrtOzEiLmI/AAAAAAAAAWQ/TMdHZRmJH4g/s1600/IMG_1507.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-F7WBtT7YkUw/TtrtOzEiLmI/AAAAAAAAAWQ/TMdHZRmJH4g/s400/IMG_1507.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
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Be forewarned: if you're tempted to comment on how "huge" I look, or to ask if it's twins, please read <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/08/wide-variety-of-healthy-and-normal.html">this blog post</a> first or face 3rd trimester hormone wrath.<br />
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So, I'm 37 weeks pregnant, which means I could have this baby as early as "any minute now" or as late as January 8, but likely between Christmas and New Year. The big milestone that comes with the pronouncement of 37 weeks is that if, for some reason, this baby decides to come sooner rather than later (which is unlikely, but still...), he would not be premature, and I'd be cleared for a safe homebirth. (Homebirth is not safe for premature babies.)<br />
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How do I feel? 9 months pregnant would be the best descriptor. I'm uncomfortable but healthy overall. I really don't have much to complain about, but since you asked... My SPD and pelvic pain are worsening. I generally do OK during the day if I stay up and moving constantly, but if I have to stand or sit in one position for an extended time, my pelvic/hip joints "freeze" and moving is very painful after that. This means that sleep is miserable because I can't change positions easily.<br />
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I'm still sleeping on a huge wedge pillow to prevent/reduce reflux, in addition to taking nightly OTC heartburn medicine that my midwife recommended. It only helps a little. I cannot lay flat whatsoever. Combine that with the fact that I'm a left-side-sleeper by nature, and with my pelvic issues, and it's not great. I wake up jackknifed on my left side, on that wedge, with my hips torqued oddly and entire pelvis aching. I have to keep my knees together to hobble to the bathroom in the night, holding onto the wall with every step. Several times, I've considered waking Rick to have him help me get to the bathroom, but I haven't resorted to that yet. The fact that it's nearly that bad isn't encouraging, considering that I still have a month or so to go (probably).<br />
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It's also hard to breathe because he's pressing against my lungs. Drop, son, drop! I remember the instant feelings of relief after the birth of my last baby with regards to easier to breathe and heartburn gone instantly. It took about a month or month-and-a-half my pelvic pain to resolve last time, for the pregnancy hormones (relaxin) to flush from my system. I hope it doesn't take that long this time, but if it does, I won't have to be afraid that I broke something.<br />
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OK, that's that, it's late and I'm 9 months pregnant and going to bed so I can pretend to try to sleep, then wake in a few hours to read magazines on my hubby's iPad since I can't sleep. I better get to it!Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-78911556718199540662011-11-27T18:26:00.001-05:002011-11-27T18:51:44.625-05:0036 week pregnancy affirmationsNowadays when I leave the house, strangers say things like,<br />
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<ul>
<li>"You look like you're ready to go any minute now!"</li>
<li>"You mean they're going to 'LET' you go that long???"</li>
<li>"Are you sure that's your due date?"</li>
<li>"You look really uncomfortable."</li>
<li>"HOW much longer???"</li>
</ul>
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Pregnancy (for me, anyway) is uncomfortable enough without strangers rubbing it in, reminding me, bringing me down, and/or discouraging me. See related post <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/08/wide-variety-of-healthy-and-normal.html">"Wide variety of healthy and normal in pregnancy."</a></div>
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These are things I tell myself to counter the negative things people say:</div>
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<ul>
<li>It's easier to take care of baby now, inside of me, than it will be once he's here.</li>
<li>He's growing on his timetable, getting exactly what he needs. It doesn't matter if he goes past my due date because a 40+ weeker is often more neurologically mature, a better nurser, cries less, easier to comfort, etc. than a 37 weeker. (I realize there are exceptions to this. Let me reiterate, these are things I tell myself to comfort myself since I know that I will almost certainly go past 40 weeks and I'm committed to allowing him to choose his own birthday, barring medical problems.)</li>
<li>My body is well designed and knows exactly what it's doing. I'm healthy (in spite of my heartburn, SPD, and waddle). My baby is healthy. My body has grown my baby from the size of a mustard seed to 7, 8, or 9+ lb without any input from me, and my body is smart enough, capable enough, and competent enough to continue its important work for this upcoming last month. My body knows when to go into labor, and what kind of labor this baby needs for his timing and positioning. </li>
<li>My body also knows how to nurse this baby. What a sweet reward that will be for my labor!</li>
<li>As we count down days to my due date on a paper chain, the chain starts looking a lot smaller, while the list of nesting that needs done before his arrival keeps getting longer! There's no need to wish away these last few weeks when I need every minute of that to prepare our home, as well as prepare my body and mind for greeting this baby.</li>
<li>It won't be much longer, and I won't be pregnant any more. This *might* be my last pregnancy. In spite of all the discomforts, pregnancy is still a miracle. It's still thrilling and amazing to feel his every move inside of me, in spite of the fact that this is my 6th pregnancy and 5th live baby. I know I'll miss feeling him squirm inside of me. I'm trying to treasure that now.</li>
<li>The minute that labor is over with and he's in my arms, my round-the-clock heartburn and reflux will be OVER!!! Like MAGIC!!!! Another sweet reward for labor!</li>
<li>Yes, I'm a public spectacle when I go out in public with my children, ages 9, 7, 5, and 3--with an obvious 3rd trimester baby bump. Oh well. Who cares. My children are well behaved, and I have nothing to be ashamed of. My children are a blessing!</li>
<li>The next few weeks will be a great time to work in a few last one-on-one activities with my first four children. There's no use in wishing baby would hurry up when I haven't completed these quality time activities with my kids!</li>
<li>Friends gave us a Chili's restaurant gift card, Starbucks gift card, and offered to watch our kids so that my husband and I can have a special date together, stress-free and guilt-free, before baby comes. There's no use in wishing baby would hurry up when we haven't even gotten to claim our date yet!</li>
<li>A friend gifted me with money for a pedicure before baby comes, and offered to go with me to get it done. There's no use in wishing baby would hurry up when I haven't gotten my pedicure yet!</li>
<li>Some time ago, I bartered a childbirth class with a friend who is a massage therapist and promised me a massage. I haven't claimed that massage yet, and she encouraged me to find a time that she can give me a massage before baby arrives. How welcome that massage will be for my poor aching pregnant body! There's no use in wishing baby would hurry up when I haven't gotten my pedicure yet!</li>
<li>In summary: there's no use in wishing baby would hurry up! All in good time.</li>
</ul>
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What positive thoughts or phrases helped you survive the last few weeks or months of pregnancy?</div>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-76986693862563124262011-11-13T22:59:00.000-05:002011-12-19T23:08:45.086-05:00Belly shot at 32 weeks along<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iD3z2kYCWc8/TsCQv97A4BI/AAAAAAAAAVU/CJtjGV03sW0/s1600/IMG_1271.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iD3z2kYCWc8/TsCQv97A4BI/AAAAAAAAAVU/CJtjGV03sW0/s400/IMG_1271.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
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The info on this photo says it was taken Oct. 30. I've lost track. I think I was 32 weeks? I'm behind on posting stuff. I still haven't even posted my 20 week ultrasound pictures! I don't have a scanner, so it would entail taking good photos of the physical paper ultrasound images (without glare), then straightening and cropping and uploading. </div>
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I'm feeling... well... 8 months pregnant, I guess, is the most fair and honest way to say it without complaining too much. I realize I'm blessed to be healthy and not to have any health problems or complications, and we're blessed that baby is healthy and growing on pace. I'm aware that there are many moms who would gladly trade me places if they could, even with all the pregnancy discomforts and inconveniences. If I'm going to be honest, though, I'll confess I'm pretty uncomfortable a majority of the time. I know I'm in the home stretch, though. I know I'll feel better right away as soon as this baby is out of me.</div>
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With preparation for Thanksgiving and then Christmas coming up, I'm sure the last few weeks will go pretty quickly. I'm glad to have a lot of distractions.</div>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-27953353599798534552011-11-10T15:38:00.001-05:002011-11-10T15:53:25.543-05:00Guest post: plans for hospital VBA2C change to repeat cesarean<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Well Rounded reader Sarah shared her birth story in her own words. Thank you for sharing, Sarah.</span><br />
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<div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">I’ve had three cesareans. The first one was not by choice. The second one was a decision based on lies. The third was part of the big picture, not mine, but part of a plan, nonetheless. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">When I was pregnant with our first child, I had never even considered going to a birthing center or a midwife. I went to a practice of obstetricians that had three male doctors. I went to a birthing class given by the hospital. Wasn’t that what all pregnant women did? </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">Around month 7, I noticed a very hard lump under my rib cage. I kept asking the doctor if this perhaps could be my son’s head. He kept reassuring me that he could feel the head “down there”. My husband even voiced his concerns and again the doctor said it was all fine. At week 40, my cervix was 85% effaced, but I hadn’t dilated at all. My official OB was in Paris on vacation, so I saw another doctor from the practice. He immediately ordered an ultrasound to determine the baby’s position. Breech. He said, “You are going in tomorrow morning for a C-section.” I cried. It didn’t even occur to me to question this decision that was made for us. Our birth story was forever altered by a stranger. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">There was never any mention of exercises to correct a breech presentation. There was never any mention of attempting aversion. There was never any mention of attempting labor to see if the child might flip over during contractions. They didn’t cover cesareans in the ill-informative birthing class.</span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">When I became pregnant with our second child, I inquired about attempting a VBAC. My OB immediately shot my request down. “Why would you want to do that?” Also, he said that the rate of uterine rupture was much higher than they originally thought. He said the risk of rupture was over 30%. [Well Rounded Birth Prep adds: The actual statistics for uterine rupture for VBAC range <a href="http://medicalcenter.osu.edu/viewer/Pages/index.aspx?NewsID=2835">from 0.7% to 0.9%.</a>] Who would want to take that risk? My husband and I immediately scheduled the repeat cesarean. It never occurred to us to check those statistics out on our own. Why would our doctor lie to us???</span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">I was all set to have my third cesarean with our third pregnancy. But, I had met some other women who had stories to tell. I felt that God was urging me in another direction. Believe me; I didn’t want to go there. Who is crazy enough to attempt a VBAC after two C-sections? How misinformed I was! After much prayer, my husband and I decided to go for a VBA2C. We hired a doula and educated ourselves with informative, private birthing classes. What an eye-opener. Why was this information not presented in a doctor’s office or a hospital-sanctioned birth class? We prepared to deliver our third child naturally, but in a hospital setting. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">At week 41, I finally went into labor on a Wednesday. I was still having consistent and stronger contractions on Thursday. By the time Friday rolled around, I was having pretty strong contractions like clockwork, every 4 minutes and 60 seconds long. We decided Friday evening to go to the hospital. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">Within an hour upon arrival, the high-risk doctor came in to tell us our baby was in distress and we needed to immediately go to surgery. My husband kicked everyone out of the room and we prayed together. The baby’s heart rate instantly dropped to normal. This would be just one out of many urgings from the many doctors we saw to have a C-section. The fear of uterine rupture from the staff was palpable. We ignored them. I found out that there had never been a VBA2C in that hospital before, according to our labor nurse of 30 years in that facility. I think the staff thought we were complete freaks, but we were given our space to labor alone. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">Saturday morning, I was still laboring naturally. My husband and I were having an extremely emotional, intimately bonding experience, even in the hospital. It was very spiritual with our praying and quoting scripture and breathing through contractions. We made the decision to not use our doula; it was that special for us both. We were walking and eating and drinking. I was taking hot showers. Basically, we were doing everything the hospital said I shouldn’t/couldn’t do. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">Around 3 pm on Saturday, the baby went into distress for the second time. The doctor suspected meconium in the amniotic fluid. So, I agreed to let him break the water to check. It was tainted. The doctor strongly urged us to have a C-section. Again we requested to be alone and prayed and the baby’s heart rate returned to normal. I continued to labor for the next five hours until we had a cesarean Saturday evening. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">I am not privy to the big picture. I totally felt God’s presence through this entire experience. I had wanted to have a vaginal birth and felt that God had opened us to this idea. Lots of people had questions as to why didn’t we do this or why did we do that. I can’t answer that. I know God’s hand was in the entire experience and delivered us through it safely. It was an incredible birth.</span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">My husband and I, as well as so many friends and family, had prayed fervently to have a labor-friendly nurse and OB on call when I went into labor. I definitely feel so blessed to have had that particular doctor on call that Saturday. He was very honest and up front about not doing anything we didn’t agree to do. He even stayed past his designated shift because he felt that he couldn’t leave us with the next on-call doc. Our labor nurse told us directly that she could only recommend something, that she couldn’t enforce anything. I highly respect these individuals and am not in any way trying to bash medical professionals. The key in this was our vocalization. My husband was the voice. He said “No!” on more than one occasion. </span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 15.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span></div><div style="font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;"><span style="font-size: large; letter-spacing: 0px;">What I do know is that I have choices. It is up to you to inform yourself about birth. Don’t let someone else decide for you. I fully believe cesareans are a necessary surgery when it is necessary. I am not anti-cesarean at all. I just believe all women should be informed about the “typical” birth in this country. That is what I take from this experience. I will educate my daughters (and son, for that matter) to be their own advocates. They will have choices that I never knew I had. They will get to write their own birth stories, I hope and pray. </span></div><div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br />
</span></div>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-12374247166413329252011-10-18T22:36:00.006-04:002011-10-19T09:32:28.440-04:00What do prenatal checkups look like with homebirth midwives?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/yu0pXqIiRdo?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br />
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I remembered viewing this video some time ago, posted by another momma who had an OB for her previous pregnancy and was seeing a midwife for this pregnancy. (Not sure of her birth location for either.) She put together this funny but 100% true video outlining the actual time spent and how it was spent, at her OB appointments vs. at her midwife appointments. The average amount of time a pregnant momma spends face-to-face with her OB at each appointment is 6 minutes. This momma actually spent 3 minutes face-to-face with her OB. That doesn't leave a lot of time for asking questions, discussing birth plans and preferences, and scoping out OB's birth philosophy and standard routines/practices, let alone relationship-building. My first pregnancy and birth was with an OB group that had 2 midwives in the practice, but the midwives practices were closely in line with the OBs', both with prenatal checkups and at births. The timeline in this video lines up with my experiences at the OB office.<br />
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I've had several people ask me what a typical midwife appointment looks like. It will vary from midwife to midwife, and it will also depend on where she practices (hospital, birth center, or homebirth). Her practices may depend on state laws or on the policies of the hospital or birth center where she works, if she's not independent.<br />
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Here's a photo essay of a typical prenatal appointment with my primary midwife of the last nearly-8 years, through 3 home waterbirths (thus far), 1 loss, and this upcoming birth. <a href="http://anmidwife.com/">Angy (Angelita) Nixon, CNM</a> has been my primary midwife through it all. <a href="http://www.facebook.com/joyinbirth">Jennifer Stewart, CPM</a>, was my assisting midwife at my other homebirths, and I love her to pieces, but she has a wonderful opportunity to move to California to attend homebirths. She'll be moving before I have my baby, so <a href="http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=500221328">Dorothy Kaeck, CPM</a>, will be the assisting midwife at my upcoming homebirth. Dorothy is wonderful too, and I'd have been happy to have had her at any of my prior births, but she has only been in WV for 2 years. Here is an overview of the personalized, one-on-one care I receive from my gentle, experienced midwives.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I arrived at my midwife's home/office for my prenatal appointment. What a view.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I got my kids settled in with the toys they brought and the toys that my midwife keeps in her living room for visiting children.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Unlike OB appointments that frequently require moms to wait with a full bladder in a waiting room for up to 30 minutes, I headed directly for the powder room, where I collected the sample, then tested it myself with the test strips my midwife leaves under her bathroom sink.<br />
*Note* the Urine Collection Container in this photo is clean and empty. You're welcome.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is my midwife's exam room. I didn't need it today.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My primary midwife, Angy, with her cup of coffee, just the way a prenatal should start.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My assisting midwife, Dorothy, making notes in my charts. I told her my weight from this morning when I weighed myself at home, then I told her that my urine sample was negative for both glucose and protein (which is good news on both accounts). How freeing it is to have that kind of trust with one's care providers.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My kids think that my midwife's spiral staircase is the most fun part of the appointments. That, and smelling her candles to find their favorites.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dorothy gets ready to prick my finger for the fasting blood sugar test. She looks way too happy to be inflicting this... Just kidding. It wasn't bad. (At my previous appointment, she drew a vial of blood for the thorough 2 hour blood sugar test plus hemoglobin check and other blood screens. It all came back with healthy results.)</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Explaining to my kids what Miss Dorothy is doing and why.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">She checks my blood pressure.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My son tries to get her to smell his feet, while stealing her chair. Successfully. He's a charmer.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Having the fasting blood sugar test behind me, now it's time for breakfast. My midwife made me Starbucks coffee and put half & half and sugar in it and brought it to me. I had brought with me 3 pumpkin muffins I made, and I shared the 3rd one with my midwives.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-eOpsEspWddU/Tp4poiH1mBI/AAAAAAAAAQM/j0Jk43rbbCE/s1600/IMG_1206.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-eOpsEspWddU/Tp4poiH1mBI/AAAAAAAAAQM/j0Jk43rbbCE/s400/IMG_1206.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Leopold's Maneuvers, which allow Dorothy to determine baby's position. He is head-down, Right Occiput Anterior.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kziM_H1DOAc/Tp4pqxfp9FI/AAAAAAAAAQU/zGEDm1OIV2A/s1600/IMG_1209.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kziM_H1DOAc/Tp4pqxfp9FI/AAAAAAAAAQU/zGEDm1OIV2A/s400/IMG_1209.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My son is the blur on the left, always in motion, taking it all in.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Are your prenatals this fun/funny?</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-s4vwpjKiyvg/Tp4ptTvgdRI/AAAAAAAAAQk/kff2_OKjn9Q/s1600/IMG_1218.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-s4vwpjKiyvg/Tp4ptTvgdRI/AAAAAAAAAQk/kff2_OKjn9Q/s400/IMG_1218.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dorothy gave me the option of listening to baby's heartbeat using fetoscope or Doppler. I prefer to use fetoscope when possible to limit unnecessary exposure to ultrasound waves. Dorothy was able to find his healthy heartbeat.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-L5VeycrYzeg/Tp4puivIx-I/AAAAAAAAAQs/OfuI9CRwRx0/s1600/IMG_1221.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-L5VeycrYzeg/Tp4puivIx-I/AAAAAAAAAQs/OfuI9CRwRx0/s400/IMG_1221.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My son is fascinated. I wonder how this will shape his views of healthy and normal pregnancy and birth, for his own future wife and children?</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2gG0j9a9Cn0/Tp4pv4HTncI/AAAAAAAAAQ0/R2xaYoBSo_M/s1600/IMG_1226.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2gG0j9a9Cn0/Tp4pv4HTncI/AAAAAAAAAQ0/R2xaYoBSo_M/s400/IMG_1226.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My 5 year old knows more than most adults do about normal pregnancy and birth.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-YvGLpJJq8Js/Tp4pz1rvFuI/AAAAAAAAARM/mY9b___AnOw/s1600/IMG_1231.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-YvGLpJJq8Js/Tp4pz1rvFuI/AAAAAAAAARM/mY9b___AnOw/s400/IMG_1231.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dorothy let me try to hear baby's heartbeat with the fetoscope, but I couldn't hear it over my children's (quiet-ish) noise. I was content to take her word for it that she heard it and it sounded great. </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nWgYI-qWwlc/Tp4p1FmFtfI/AAAAAAAAARU/lNiKCQX6eOQ/s1600/IMG_1234.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nWgYI-qWwlc/Tp4p1FmFtfI/AAAAAAAAARU/lNiKCQX6eOQ/s400/IMG_1234.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dorothy measures from my pubic bone to my fundus. Baby is measuring 31.5 cm when I'm at 30 weeks, but that's within normal, and could just be a growth spurt or a due to his position.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>I arrived at my midwife's home/office right at 9:30 for my checkup (9:30 checkup time). I had 0 waiting time. In between photos, we discussed how I'm feeling, whether I've experienced swelling (some but minimal), how frequently I've been noticing baby's movements and how/when to do kick counts, whether I've had Braxton Hicks contractions, whether I've had any troubling physical symptoms (I haven't), how to recognize symptoms of preterm labor, how and when to get rid of Braxton Hicks contractions, benefits of perineal massage and when to begin, benefits of Evening Primrose Oil and when to begin, what kind of birth control plans we have, what plans I'm making with my doula, scheduled my next appointment for 2 weeks from now, and chatted about what's new in the last 2 weeks since I saw them.<br />
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All inclusive, I was there 1 hour 15 minutes, with everything covered at a leisurely and relaxed pace. No wonder I so look forward to prenatals. It's just about the only time I have to devote to real focus on my pregnancy and baby, since life gets so busy with the everyday functions of running a house of 6.<br />
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I realize that there are a lot of variations in care among OBs and midwives. This is just *my* experience with *my* midwives. What have been your experiences? Have you changed care providers and experienced different practices?Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-65125062898437120642011-10-17T19:00:00.002-04:002011-10-17T19:00:01.836-04:00"Look, Mom! I made a placenta!"<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-N3VQCYo20_Y/TptykFNuG-I/AAAAAAAAAOc/GXcKersmeTQ/s1600/IMG_1174.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-N3VQCYo20_Y/TptykFNuG-I/AAAAAAAAAOc/GXcKersmeTQ/s400/IMG_1174.jpg" width="300" /></a></div><br />
"Look, Mom! I made a placenta!" My 7 year old said this to me, completely not staged. This was with her brand new Silly Putty. See the umbilical cord attached to the placenta. I was a mixture of amused and proud of her. I guess it's pretty clear that she's the child of a childbirth educator. I'm sorry the pic is a bit blurry, but it's the only one I took, and I can't go back and re-do the whole thing and force her to make *another* placenta out of Silly Putty.Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-85082256449148995952011-10-16T17:40:00.002-04:002011-10-16T17:45:43.561-04:0030 weeks along belly pic<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QnwmlmANgQ8/TptKVcaTOWI/AAAAAAAAAOM/uq46WDb8VSY/s1600/IMG_1177.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QnwmlmANgQ8/TptKVcaTOWI/AAAAAAAAAOM/uq46WDb8VSY/s400/IMG_1177.jpg" width="300" /></a></div><br />
Yes, I'm 30 weeks along. Yes, I'm aware that's only 7 1/2 months. <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/08/wide-variety-of-healthy-and-normal.html">Yes, we're sure it's not twins</a>, and we're as certain as we can be about our due date range.<br />
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I'm doing OK. I exercised so faithfully until a little over a month ago, then discovered that I couldn't manage to get myself and all 4 kids to the YMCA and back in a reasonable enough time to exercise *then* do homeschool when we got home, so something had to give. "Something" turned out to be both my Pilates class and water aerobics class. I am still trying to find something I can do that doesn't interfere with school (either with the time slot or with my energy level and ability to keep up with other life responsibilities). With my third baby, I did a great job getting on the treadmill 4-5 days a week, walking 25 minutes, but I have so much hip/pelvic pain that walking (waddling) is a challenge. I'm still seeing a chiropractor weekly for upkeep, maintenance, and prevention of malpositioning. I'm still taking the "right" supplements for my needs. I am still doing <a href="http://spinningbabies.com/techniques/the-inversion">Spinning Babies inversions</a> daily for prevention of malpositioning. I had lots of SPD pain and pelvic/hip pain with my last pregnancy. Sacroiliac pain began months ago. SPD started about a month ago, but not yet as painful as it got with my last baby. I guess it's the fault of relaxin + 6th pregnancy.<br />
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Reflux started several weeks ago, as well. I avoid eating late in the evening, and if I'm feeling refluxy, I eat ginger products that I have around from morning sickness prevention/remedy. The best solution, for me, has been sleeping on a wedge pillow. You know, ones from the home health section of pharmacies? I don't like sleeping on an incline, but it's the best of the available options. It beats getting up, going downstairs, then attempting to sleep alone on our recliner. It also beats sitting bolt upright every 20 minutes with reflux.<br />
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Church friends of ours, Kim and Dave, gave us an upright freezer for our garage! This was the most exciting baby gift I could have asked for. How was that a baby gift? I'm hoping to fill it before baby comes, since I won't have time or energy to cook for quite a while. Maybe I can get by with fewer grocery store trips if I stock up now, too. I have been saving an article from Better Homes & Gardens since October 2009 with brilliant organizing ideas for an upright freezer. Just wait til I'm done with this freezer. It'll be a work of art.<br />
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I guess we're cruising right along, trying to tread water with the same everyday things we all have with children this age (school, afterschool activities, feeding our family of 6+, and trying to keep up with the laundry). I just figured it was about time for an update, in case anyone was wondering.<br />
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</tbody></table>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3271893222326606837.post-58823472245107453342011-10-15T23:31:00.003-04:002011-10-15T23:49:14.803-04:00Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, whether I wanted to or not.October 15th rolled around again: <a href="http://october15th.com/">Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day</a>. I haven't mourned my loss of Evan Michael in so long I can't remember. (If you want to read the backstory, here's my post on <a href="http://wellroundedbirthprep.blogspot.com/2011/04/day-my-world-came-crashing-down-4-year.html">The Day My World Came Crashing Down</a>.) There are lots of reasons, I guess, but primarily because I've been too busy with responsibilities, deadlines, and other emotionally demanding issues that I haven't devoted any time to grief. I think I mistakenly tried to convince myself that I'm "making progress" or "moving forward" or some such baloney, since I haven't cried about it in so long and I can almost always talk about what happened calmly and with a level voice, as if I were recounting something that happened to somebody else, or maybe something I read about. On the anniversary of my loss this past April, and on the anniversary of burying Evan's remains in May, I didn't even get out my memory box or photo album.<br />
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It might have been October 15th last year when I last cried about Evan. I didn't pay much attention to October 15th coming up today. I didn't make special plans to memorialize his short life, light a candle during the Wave of Light around the world, or even post anything in particular about it on my Facebook. In fact, I rather wanted to avoid the subject altogether because I felt that if I ignored it, I'd be able to go along with my weekend as I have any other weekend.<br />
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Today snuck up on me and overtook me. Part of the difficulty of October 15th, for me, is that it coincides with Evan's due date/week, October 21, 2007. I feel on edge and melancholy from October 15 through 21, most years. Maybe I'm hormonal, at just-now 30 weeks pregnant. Maybe I needed a release valve for a number of other (unrelated) stresses. Or maybe I'm *still* ignoring the obvious: it was time to remember Evan, whether I was ready to or not.<br />
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I cried on and off all day. I managed to busy myself doing laundry, re-organizing the laundry room, culling outgrown kids' clothes, changing out seasonal clothes and new sizes for some of the kids, and using my label maker to get my laundry room and kids' dressers better organized (on the off chance that we could have people helping us with laundry after the baby comes). Anything that involves using my label maker substantially brightens my day. Additionally, Rick took me and our two older girls (ages 9 and 7; the 2 youngers are at their aunt's house tonight) to a Japanese Hibachi for dinner, which is a great show and an amazing meal. It was the girls' first time at a Hibachi, and they thoroughly enjoyed it. I felt much better once I got out of the house. I was too afraid to leave the house earlier in the day because I was afraid I'd have a blubbering meltdown, completely unprovoked, in the middle of the grocery store, at 7.5 months pregnant (but looking full term). I couldn't risk it.<br />
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Today, it felt like my emotional dam burst. I wanted to get it over with and move on with my day, but it kept resurfacing. I couldn't control or contain it. I just had to ride the waves.<br />
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I'd like to say, "Tomorrow will be better. Tomorrow is a new day," but I know that I won't truly feel the shroud removed from me until October 21 has passed, which would/could/should have been Evan's 4th birthday.<br />
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<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">I guess I'm not immune to grief. Few are, and the odds were against me. It's part of the process, so I may as well embrace it, rather than feel like a failure for crumbling, for revealing vulnerability.</div><div><br />
</div>Sarah--Well Rounded Birth Prephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00430583826211639431noreply@blogger.com4